𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐝.

Chapter 6 - Time Machine

Leo POV

I felt Neymar's warm, strong chest pull away from mine in fear, in despair. I could hear his heart rate through his chest, but it was drowned out by my own, pounding deafeningly in my ear in contrast to the horrified silence that enveloped us.

"Leo—" He whispered, his voice crackly and hoarse in apology. "I'm so sorry..."

I smiled sadly back at him, before reaching my arms out to him.

"Come. Come here, Ney." I beckoned him, and without hesitation he fell forward into my arms, and crumpled down to tears. "Sh. It's fine. It's fine."

"I don't know why I did that, Leo," he wiped his red eyes with the back of his thumb, taking a long, wet, shaky breath before continuing. "I just— I just thought—"

"It doesn't matter. But why did you kiss me, Ney?" I asked gently, careful not to push any boundaries. I stroked his curls lightly, wrapping them around my finger and unwrapping them again. He was silent, and remained like that. "If you don't want to answer, that's fine," I whispered, tracing the words and patterns of ink on his tattooed skin. 

"I love you, Leo. How— how could you have been so blind not to see that? I mean, I was trying my fucking best to show you that I was better than anyone else for you. I was proving that I was a good person for you. Yet you never even noticed: you were just too oblivious to see that someone cares for you, because—"

No. No, no, no, no, no. I blocked my ears, shutting out Neymar's voice which was rising in anger. How could I have been so blind? My vision blurred, and Neymar's dark hair swam before my eyes. I felt dizzy, so faint... "Leo... Leo, NO. DON'T — LEO! LEO, GET UP!" Neymar screamed, shaking my cold yet burning body awake.

Panic attack.

My breathing hitched, and I inhaled and exhaled as best as I could, trying not to focus on the furious pounding in my head. The tip of my nose started to sweat, tiny little beads forming as I squinted over to see Ney's loving face, with his emerald eyes shining... with tears. "Leo... I'm so sorry. I was being insensitive. Again. Please forgive me, please excuse my bitchiness, please..." he begged, skimming his cool fingertip against my burning forehead.

"I'm sorry for not noticing you. I'm sorry for ignoring you. I'm sorry for everything, Ney. Please, you forgive me." I pleaded, sitting up and clutching his neck for support. Out of reflex, his arms reached towards my waist and caught me there, almost lifting me up. 

No. I can't do this anymore. I just can't. "I'm sorry, Ney... I need to go."

And so I fled from his house, pushing open the door and running for my life out, leaping into my car and driving away, so fast, fast, fast. I couldn't give two fucks then - my only intention was to distract myself from Neymar.

He was so dangerous. He lured me into his trap. His trap that I couldn't refuse because I was hopelessly head-over-heels in love with him to care.

I don't care what I looked like now. I don't care if I looked like the biggest coward in the world, because if I lingered any more with him, he would soon find someone else and drop me like a bomb.

Oh, I just wish I had a time machine, so I could go back in time and move to another football club which he would never join in with. I wish I could go back in time so I could warn myself not to fall for him again.

And now I couldn't help but just thank heaven for the beauty of tears, how they blurred the world when it was too harsh for you to look at. Wiping them with the back of my hand, I tried keeping my eyes on the road, warm with the bright golden-yellow street lights of the Barcelona highway.