When Does Hope Begin?

Harebell

Peach woke up to a quiet argument. She still wouldn't open up her eyes for fear she'd see nothing but darkness. It would prove she'd gone insane from her time spent in the nightmarish darkness. "I'm not going to leave her," she heard a deep voice whisper harshly, with that Peach could feel the pressure around her hands tightening. 

"Staying in here is no good," said the familiar female voice, the one she couldn't place for the life of her. "You need to see White Wolf. Lead the people who followed you. You've been in here for a week, she is healing but you will be of no use should you stay here." Peach felt panic begin to speed up her heart. A week? She had been out of it for a week? Who would be waiting around for a week?

"I'm not leaving Peach and our baby!" This time the hushed words were louder, and it jarred her mind into full awareness as memories started coming back, and so did remembering she'd been so hungry she had finally passed out. 

"Steve!" Peach gasped as her eyes shot open before closing quickly as even the dim lights hurt her sensitive eyes. The pressure was painful, but she was gripping back as tight as her body would allow her to. "Stevie.." Her usually soft voice croaked, dry, and from the lack of use. 

"Peach?" Steve's harsh voice was suddenly soft, and gentle, and if Peach wasn't mistaken he sounded as if he had been crying. "Hey sweetheart, how are you feeling? Hm?" Peach reopened her eyes to take in his sad blue ones, they appeared to be red-rimmed, he had a beard and his hair was slightly unkempt. Peach reached with her free hand to touch his face, and he leaned forward to help her out. 

"You have a beard," she stated softly in wonder, trying to drink him in after a long separation. Her eyes twisted briefly as someone held a straw to her lips and slipped her lips around it allowing the cool liquid to slide down her throat, leaving her to shiver with the pleasure of it. A whimper escaped her chest when it was taken from her. Licking her lips for water that may have escaped she turned her head to drink Steve in. It had been a long three, no, four months since she last saw him. 

"I do," he spoke back, bringing her hand up to his lips and kissing it long and hard. His throat moved convulsively as he tried to find something to say. Anything to make what happened better. 

"The baby?" It came out as a sigh, as her eyes slid closed again feeling tired. Leaving her free hand to fall to the baby bump that was still there. Was the baby okay? "I tried.." 

"Shh," Steven immediately interjected, gripping her hand just as tightly again. "The baby is perfect, I... I got to see it." His voice cracked, making Peach force her eyes open to look at him. This was a moment she had dreamed about, that they would be united once again and bond over the baby. She was so tired, and the guilt in his eyes made her tired heart shatter. 

"What's wrong?" That surprised a laugh out of him, causing him to lean back and shake his head and hold out a hand. Peach was startled to see the man with the plan to be so overcome with emotion. She was fine, for the most part, and back with him. So what was the problem?

"You were tortured, Peach, you were starved," the last part did make Steve's voice break. His chest was heaving with barely controlled emotion that left them both floundering for words. "They left you in the dark... For god knows how long and you want to know what's wrong?" He sounded so devastated that Peach wanted to make it all okay. 

"But we're okay," Peach fought to stay focused on his face, wanting him to see that it wasn't his fault that this had happened. Being taken to the raft was the worst thing to have ever happened to her, sure, but she had lost him with the uncertainty she'd ever see him again. That had felt infinitely worse. The baby was okay... That's all that should matter. 

"I got you taken by the government and tortured," his voice was growing louder again with his rising emotion, causing Peach to flinch back. Steve swallowed again, taking back his hands despite her desperate grab. "Ross and Ellis took you... They found the burner phone, and they took you. It's my fault you're like this." Yet she knew he couldn't regret saving Bucky or going against the Accords. 

Peach shook her head again and made a grab for his hand which he evaded causing a distressed cry to finally break out. "Stop it! Just stop it!" Emotion threatened to drown her as he finally let her grab his hand again but he seemed to be unwilling to touch her. "Do you still love me?" Guilt was a powerful motivator, maybe he was just there because he felt responsible for it all. They hadn't physically seen each other in so long, so there's a chance he might not actually... The thought alone left pain ripping through her chest. 

"What?" Disbelief crossed his face, looking as if he couldn't quite believe that it crossed her mind that he might not love her. "Peach, sweetheart, you're everything to me." He brushed back some hair off of her forehead, and for a moment she wondered how bad her ebony locks looked. She had been without proper nutrition, and the ability to shower regularly. 

"Good, because I still love you," the last came with a yawn that took over her entire body as she shuddered. The bed dipped as Steve sidled in, bringing her against him, running his hand over her arm and down her side, resting on her stomach. 

"Go to sleep, I've got you," Steve pressed a kiss to the top of her head as Peach allowed herself to go back to sleep. 

Peach reawakened colder than she had been going to sleep, and very obviously alone. She moved her arm out to feel the bed beside her and began to panic. There was no one there. "Steve?" 

"Hey mama," came a softer voice beside her, causing her to turn her head to catch sight of Sam reading a book. "How are you feeling?"

"Sam?" Peach could feel tears beginning to rise and slip down her face without her permission. It had been so long and he looked so tired from where she lay. "You look terrible." Sam tilted his head back and let out a laugh before shaking his head. 

"Missed you too, Peach," he grinned a bit before looking around the room, and Peach did too. Realizing that while she still had an IV she was no longer in a hospital-like room. He must have caught onto her confused look before he merely shook his head. "Steve wanted you somewhere more comfortable. Shuri said you still needed the IV, so they compromised. You get a large comfy bed and still get the medical care you and baby Rogers need. It's probably more comfortable for Steve too. The man hasn't left your side since we found you, except for now. I forced him to go shower and get something to eat. He hasn't... He wasn't doing well when we left you, and when he found out about the baby he became obsessive, and when Tony-" 

"Tony?!" Peach exclaimed weakly, struggling into a sitting position. Sam hurried to help her, keeping a hand on her back as she panted with the effort. "Tony got ahold of you? How?"

Sam was worried about her sudden energy and moving, glancing nervously at the IV pole. "He hacked into your doctor's records, I know, it was an invasion of privacy but he was hoping that there was some way to contact Steve. He was right. So he got the number and contacted us," his smile dimmed as he remembered when they first heard. 

"It took Tony a while to figure out a way to contact us. Getting into your records was honestly a last-ditch effort before beginning to fly around the world himself. As soon as Steve heard... He lost it, I've never seen him so angry," Sam confided in Peach before hearing a throat clear. 

"It's one thing to come after me, another thing entirely to go after the one person I love so much," Steve responded as he leaned against the doorway his arms folded surveying the scene. "Had Ellis and Ross been around when we showed up I might have actually killed them. They hurt you and possibly our baby. They kept you in deplorable conditions and called it justice. Tony felt guilty, as he should, and... He told us where you were. It was actually because of Shuri we were able to get you. Turns out even if I'm a super soldier I can't dive deep enough for the prison." 

"Whose Shuri and where are we?" Peach realized she sounded a bit wary, but while Steve trusted her, there had never been an official introduction. 

"Shuri is the Princess of Wakanda, also something of a doctor," he answered realizing it must have sounded unbelievable. "We brought Bucky to Wakanda when Prince T'Challa offered him protection. They are helping him and while we could have stayed here I thought... I thought I could find a place where you'd feel more comfortable but..." His face screwed up in pain realizing had he stayed they could have reunited sooner. They could have avoided her stint in the underwater prison. 

"Are we going to stay here now?" Peach asked, ready to ditch if Steve said they were leaving. 

"You're in no position to be going anywhere Mama," Stam interjected, a clear frown on his face as he sent a pointed look at her. "You're here for the foreseeable future." The way he said that made panic send a shiver down her back. 

"Me? What about you?" Her voice grew shrill as she looked from Sam to Steve. "If I'm stuck here, you'll be here? Right?" The seconds they were quiet were enough to send her into body-wrenching sobs as panic gripped her. Peach didn't think she'd survive another separation. Strong arms wound their way around her, pressing her against his chest. 

"Breath, take a deep breath with me, sweetheart," Steve brushed back Peach's hair that had plastered itself against her forehead in panic. "I'm staying. I'm staying with you, I'm not leaving you again, I promise. Shhhh, shhh. It's okay.." It wasn't, Peach felt like she was shattering and there was no way to put her back together again. Her entire experience was pressing down on her, making her chest heavy and her lungs painful. She had been hurt, and there was a lingering fear that Ellis and Ross would find a way to take her again. That even the country Wakanda would not stop them from overreaching. 

"I don't want to be alone," she sobbed and was only vaguely aware of the door shutting quietly with a click. Sam must have decided the two needed to be alone while she worked through her panic. "I can't do this alone Steve. I tried and I tried but I can't." Peach couldn't even process his words as she melted into a puddle of tears and panic. Eventually crying herself out and laying practically catatonic in his arms. 

"I'm not going to leave you and our baby... I'm not going to leave either of you," Steve had been repeating that for over an hour, she realized, so that she'd hear it at some point. "We'll stay here and no one is going to hurt you again. Shuri, T'Challa, and the others will make sure of it. All right? I love you, sweetheart." Steve pressed a kiss to her sweaty forehead. She could almost feel him relax since she was no longer in hysterics. In reality, Peach was letting go of pent-up exhausted fear and tears she had to hold in while alone. For the last four-ish months she'd had to face pregnancy alone it all came out. It was safe. She was safe to express everything without worrying what it might look like to Ross or Ellis. 

"I'm sorry... I just... I don't know," it sounded lame, it felt even lamer to finish like that. Peach wanted to be whole and put together for Steve but couldn't even find the energy. 

"Shh, let me take care of you right now. You and the baby," Steve whispered into her hair, running a hand down to her belly and smiling softly. His smile grew brittle when the baby kicked, facing his own loss at missing out on so much. "When you're better I'll show you around. For now... Let's get some rest." Steve situated them so he was lying on the bed with her pulled against him. Careful not to get entangled in the IV line, but equally unwilling to relinquish her just for that reason.