Granny Thayer, Demon Slayer || Collab with SophieKestrel

Chapter 18: The Fourth Wall

They awoke at the buttcrack of dawn.

Not the freshly-clothed buttcrack, mind you... nor was it the stripper's buttcrack, skillfully unveiled a little at a time. No, this was the accidentally-exposed buttcrack, sagging low enough to expose more lipoma than muscle.

"Land ahoy!" yelled Kelan.

Violet struggled to wipe the sleep from her eyes. However, something soon yanked her from her slumber: a distinct smell wafting toward them from the nearby island.

"Smells like leather jackets, straight from the store," said Maisie, fondling the worn leather of her sleeve.

"I smell margaritas!" Tay announced, swishing their tie-dyed dress.

Akram waved his spork at them. "You're both wrong. That smell is clearly tea with crumpets."

But Violet smelled something else, something familiar, something of utmost importance.

"I smell roses," she whispered, "sautéed in brown sugar."

Ahead of them, the island loomed, surprisingly welcoming in the early morning sunlight. It was a pretty island, with glowing white sand and lush green palm trees. As Violet watched, a flock of shorebirds alighted, scuttling along the sand to avoid the crashing waves.

"Are you sure this is the right place?" Violet asked, frowning. "I had expected the Dark Lord's island to be a bit more... well... dark. And zombified."

Raj frowned down at the island, his eyes clouding as though recalling something unpleasant. "Yes," he said. "I might have been in the clutches of a dozen demons, but I remember this island quite well. The citadel should be about a day's walk from here."

"Well then, I guess we'd better get going," said Saya briskly. She was already stuffing things into her duffel bag. "Why put off a heroic rescue until tomorrow if we can get it done today?"

Violet turned to her, surprised. "Are you really certain," she asked in an undertone, "that you want to come?" After all, Saya had only agreed to tag along with them in the first place because her rabid fangirling had gotten a bit out of hand. "This ship seems much safer, and you seem to really like it here. Who knows what dangers might be waiting for us in the Dark Lord's citadel?"

Saya rolled her eyes. "You've forgotten," she said irritably. "I've been in the Dark Lord's citadel before. I swindled him, remember? I'm probably the most useful person on this mission. Plus, no way would I miss a chance to visit the citadel. It's a real treat. It has the best margaritas, and the piña coladas are to die f..." She trailed off at Violet's skeptical expression and sighed. "Never mind. You'll understand when we get there."

She glanced at Maisie. "I hope you don't mind that I'm coming back to this ship when we're done. After all, all my possessions are still here. It's not like I can go carting a wagon of goods across the island on a stealth mission."

Maisie nodded. "We'll keep all your things safe and sound for your return," she promised.

And with that, they marched into the forest.

...And immediately ran back toward the beach again.

"Ahhh!" Saya shrieked. "Why are there so many mosquitos?"

"It might have something to do with being in the tropics," said Raj, swatting away a particularly large mosquito that was doing its best to set up shop near his ear. "The last time I was here, the demons just carried me over the forest, so I didn't have to deal with the bugs."

"Okay," said Saya. "New plan. We follow the beach until we reach the Dark Lord's citadel. The breeze will blow the bugs away."

LB shook his head. "We'll be horribly exposed. The Dark Lord will see us coming from miles away."