Abschied || suicide translated

part 9

It has now been two years since I attempted suicide. And that's how long I've been with Clara. Life isn't perfect and I'm still not completely rid of these thoughts, but I see meaning in life again. There is something worth fighting for. I managed to find new friends who support me on my way. My parents still don't know about the night they almost lost their daughter and I don't plan on telling them. Clara's parents are also a great support. They make sure I'm comfortable whenever I'm with them and have even found a volunteer therapist who I now see regularly. I don't hurt myself as often as I used to and when I do I have a friend who knows how to deal with the situation and who manages to cheer me up. My life, which seemed so hopeless to me, gets new color every day thanks to her. In school, too, I found the connection again and can participate in life. I visit the other girl's grave regularly again. I wish she had found someone like me. When I'm with her now, I no longer have the feeling of wanting to follow her, more of a shame that I didn't help her when she needed it. I often wonder how her family is doing today because I never saw her sister again either. When I leave the cemetery again today, people I can rely on are waiting for me at home. Who I love and who love me. The world isn't that bad after all.