See the rain through one eye

2

Hua Cheng, once striped of everything, is just a man.

Maybe even a child still. He's didn't grow up naturally. He matured young and fort to live each day. He learnt how cruel the world could be and how weak the human mind was.

He learnt not to cry. Not to scream or wail. He learnt to hide. To blend in. To become a shadow you overlook. And for a while that worked.

It seemed Hong Hong'er was destined for a bad life. His parents weren't together his mother having been abandoned. Hong Hong'er didn't care. He didn't need a dad his mother was more than enough.

She loved him and that was enough.

When everyone through blame at Hong Hong'er his mother opened her arms to him. When everyone yelled and cursed at Hong hong'er , his mother whispers sweet words to soothe him.

When Hong Hong'er became impulsive she cooled him down and held him tight.

They didn't have much but their love was enough.

Then Hong hong'er's mother died.

The world seemed to stop for the boy. He was only young. So young he could barely recall what was happening other than his mother wasn't responding.

Hong Hong'er had seen dead animals he had killed animals. It meant nothing. He felt nothing. But this was the first time death had truly affected him. Hong Hong'er had cried that day. Then the next he went out and stole some bread for her grave.

The next day he'd say by her grave all day until dark and the day after that he returned home. Once he was back he saw their tiny home wrecked.

Hong hong'er wasn't welcome in this world and he never realised how much until his mother had gone.

If what he faced was bad before, now it was worse. His eye the sole reason for all the torment was picked on and poked and he as a boy was beaten.

When there was talk of a huge parade happening Hong hong'er had finally had enough the day prior to that he had been held down while some kids tried to pull his eye out of his socket. Hong hong'er had barely made it out all in-tacked.

So the day of the parade he'd made up his mind.

There were a huge crowds everywhere. People cheered. They sang the rejoiced. Hong Hong'er didn't. He crawled his way up to the gate wall hundreds of feet in the air. Then?

Then he screamed as loud as he could letting all his anger out on the world then he jumped.

It was a glorious feeling. Like you're flying through the air. Nothing could get him. Nothing was out of his control. It was just him for eternity.

Until it wasn't. He was caught. And suddenly all his thoughts of death vanished.

An angel. A pure being of light scooped him up and he could do nothing but stare one eyed up in amazement.

Xie Lian had saved both his body and mind that day. But at what cost?

Hong hong'er was a no one. He had nothing to give and got nothing to take.

"It's been so long."

Hua Cheng huffs out a laugh. He's no longer that little boy. He's not timid and scared. He doesn't cry or hurt. He's not Hong Hong'er, He's Hua Cheng now. And he doesn't need to cling to anyone. Well I mean he does, but he chose that, besides he like to cling to dianxia.

He has nothing he can't have and by the same amount nothing that he would be sad to loose. Except...

Xie Lian.

But more than loosing Xie Lian, Hua Cheng would give absolutely anything to make him happy.

Xie Lian brought out the absolute best of Hua Cheng. Helped him grow and feel emotions he's locked away. Hua Cheng wouldn't be here without his love for his highness.

But it's on the other side of that where things get messy. Because of Xie Lian and Hua Cheng's devotion to him, something ugly has formed.

Something Xie Lian would cry over if he knew. Hua Cheng won't ever tell him. He knows the god too well Xie Lian would feel guilty. Upset and hurt to know he was the cause of something so horrid.

Hua Cheng couldn't hide it tho. It was always there in his mind. The darkest part of him. Formed from insecurities, abandonment and blind longing, covered up by the label of love and devotion.

You see Hua Cheng didn't lie when he said he'd do anything for Xie lian. If he got it into his mind he'd do it. If Xie lian was upset over something, say his kingdom having been whipped out...

If it that mean he needed to remove himself from the narrative... to disappear from Xie Lian's life he would. Because his love for his husband branched out from pure and utter devotion. The likes of which have never been heard of before.

And as a devotee, isn't it his duty to ensure that Xie Lian is free from suffering?

Doesn't it fall to him to fix the mistakes that hurt his god?

Should he not ensure only the best quality of life is experienced by his saviour?

Even before becoming a god Xie Lian was an angel, a god in mortal form. He was light he was love and he was talent. He was a beacon that wrapped the whole kingdom in warmth.

His kingdom worshiped him without knowing his face. And then the worship only grew even stronger when they got a glance of his divinity.

Such divinity. And Hua Cheng has the task of keeping it. That immortal being of such high power looked at him and only him.

Hua Cheng had won his love. And that's something he can even explain. Why he of all men would be granted such a thing. So he'd stay through hardships. And he'd fight by his side.

Really the ghost was no different to the god. He came from a life of suffering, he was bullied, he was lost, he had nothing.

But when such a heavenly being such as his prince hurled towards him like a comet, and caught him in soft perfumed arms. Well much like everyone else in the kingdom Hua Cheng was a hooked.

In both ways that day Hua Cheng fell, and he fell hard. He now had his light. His world was filled with colours of reds, creams, yellows and golds. He felt for the fist time, since his mother had died, safe.

The flicker in his heart burst into a blaze and devotion took over his entire being. Hua Cheng knew it was unhealthy, he knew he was so far from Xie Lian but he needed him in his life.

And perhaps that's when Hua Cheng a simple boy had became a most terrifying monster.