Bellatrix Black x one shots

I believe you're special

10.
˓ I believe you're special ˒
requested by hqlenaluv
words count:
[1110]

tw:
« mention of self harm »
« overall sad content »
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I was at the Malfoy Manor, Draco offered me to go with him for a weekend to his house so I would take a break from school, but it actually still wasn't helping. I was laying on my bed in my guest bedroom when I heard a knock on the door.

"I literally told you a few minutes ago to leave me alone, Draco" I said, annoyed. In the next moment I heard the door opening.

"Seriously, Draco, what the hell is wrong with you-" I shouted, still facing the window.

"It's alright, it's me" it was Bellatrix's voice. I slowly turned around to look at her. She sat next to me on the edge of the bed.

"What's wrong? You weren't at the breakfast" she asked. Bellatrix never wanted to show if she was worrying about anyone, maybe expect her sister, and me. I was glad to be an exception, but this also was making me feel something for her, stronger than a friendship.
With our every conversation I was feeling more and more attached to her.

"I wasn't hungry" I said, not looking into her eyes.

"Did you and Draco argued? Come on, you can tell me" she said, tilting her head to the side.

"It's not about Draco..." I shifted a little on my bed. I didn't want to cry or show how I really feel, but one single tear already escaped my eye. Bella fastly moved closer and wiped it away with her thumb.

"Then what is it about?" she asked, still stroking slowly my cheek.

"I don't know I just feel like I'm... losing it" I said with glossy eyes. "I'm tired all the time and I can't do anything to stop it. Draco took me here so I would feel better, but it actually don't make any difference. I feel like there's no place for me where I can feel alright."

She was still studying my face for a moment, then stood up.

"I might know what can help you. Follow me" she said, giving me her hand.

"Bella, I'm really not in the mood to go anywhere..."

"My room is not far away, is it?" she said and raised her eyebrow, still waiting for me to take her hand. And I did.

‧₊˚.

After we went inside her bedroom, there was an awkward silence. I was there before, but this time it felt different.

"So why we're here?" I asked, looking at her.

"Muffliato" she whispered, pointing at the door. I gave her a confused look.

"Just in case, so no one will hear anything from our conversation" she explained. She moved closer and we both sat on the bed.

"Listen, you can go if you... don't want my company" she said, looking into my eyes. "But I don't think you want to be alone right now. There's too many thoughts in your little head" she gave me a slight smile.

My lips started to tremble. She was right, I didn't want to be alone, she was the only person I wanted to be with in that moment. But at the same time, I knew I couldn't keep doing this, attaching to her more and more.

Now I couldn't even control my crying, I just simply broke in front of her. She quickly embraced me with her arms. At first I wanted to move away from her, but I gave up and hugged her back, holding tight. She was gently stroking my back with one of her hands and my hair with the other one.

"I'm tired..." I said with a breaking voice. My face was buried in her messy hair.

"Shh it's okay, I know" she whispered back, increasing the grip.

After a few minutes of crying I finally moved away a little, breathing heavily.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to be a burden, I should just probably stay at Hogwarts-" I started but Bellatrix quickly stopped me from saying anything more.

"You're not. A burden. To anyone. You hear me? And I'm sure it's better when you're here than in Hogwarts."

Because you're here, I thought.

I slowly nodded my head. She pulled me closer, so I could rest my head on her shoulder.

I didn't realize she was looking at my wrists till she lightly stroked one of them with her thumb, touching my old and fresh cuts. Inside I started to panic.

"Why did you do this?" she asked calmly, still looking at my hands.

"Just trying to cope with my hopelessness, I guess" I answered quietly.

"You know it's not a solution... promise me you won't hurt yourself again" she said sternly, looking into my eyes.

"I don't think if I can promise something I'm not sure I can keep" I answered, giving her a sad smile, then looking at my hands in shame. She quickly took up my chin, making me look at her.

"Promise me, y/n. I won't let you feel this way anymore."

It took all my strength, but after a moment of silence I finally said "I promise". She gave me a soft smile.

"You're so beautiful..." she said while stroking my cheek.

"Yeah, especially when I'm crying" I answered with anxious laugh. Then all of sudden, she pressed her lips onto mine, taking me by surprise.

"Especially when you're blushing" she said after we broke apart. I blushed even more.

Wait, does that mean...

She nodded.

Oh, so she also heard my thoughts...

"I did" she said, kissing me once more. I kissed her back.

"I really do care about you, y/n. I don't care about much people, if I even care about anyone at all. I believe you're special, little one" Bellatrix said, whispering the last part.

I snuggled into her chest, hugging her tightly, not knowing how to thank her any other way, or say anything.

"Can we spoon? I'm sleepy" I whispered while still inhaling her scent, my eyes heavy from crying.

"Of course" she whispered back, kissing my head.

‧₊˚.

After we changed into more comfortable clothes, we laid in Bellatrix's bed. She put her green covers over both of us, making sure I'm feeling warm. She hugged me tightly from the back, pulling me closer to her by my waist, like our bodies suited perfect for each other.

"We can stay here as long as you want to" she said as she was stroking gently my hair. "And as long as you need to."

"Thank you" I whispered back, half way asleep.

"Sleep well, my darling" she said, kissing softly my cheek.

I finally felt that I found my place I was looking for a long time. Where I was feeling alright.

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autor's note:
I know this chapter is very 'soft Bella coded' but lately I'm mostly in a mood for writing this type of things.

also I'm sorry for anyone who's struggling at the moment, just please remember if you don't have anyone to talk to, I'm always here :)<3

anyway, go check hqlenaluv profile if you haven't already!<3

xx,
-V