Her Voice Within

Chapter 1

ILHAAM 

    
    

     I could hear it all, the laughter, the argument, the teasing everything. From up here in my room, where I sat on my bed reading a book...No wait, who I'm I kidding? I don't know what the book is about, heck I don't even know the name of the book. So let me rephrase that statement, holding up a book to my face.

     Why? I would answer that question if I didn't also need a good explanation as to why. Cause I honestly don't have a reasonable reason.

     Well I could say reading and passing time. But who I'm I deceiving, myself? Cause it seems like it. When in actual reality I'm just shielding myself with books and isolating myself from people and the world. So tell me how could I now be deceiving anyone but myself. It's just too obvious not to see or are they just Soo oblivious or just don't give a fuck to care less about what I do.

     Oh! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to trail off like that. But I advise you to get use to it because I tend to get stuck in my head and lost in thoughts until someone eventually brings me out of my trance and back to reality. Which sucks by the way since that is my only escape.

     So, where was I? Right. The house was bustling with activity today. Almost everyone was present, except for my elder brother, Hamma Adnan. He's the third child and serves in either the Air Force or Civil Defense. I can't be entirely sure. The thing is, I don't know much about any of my siblings, aside from their names.

     At least I could say a thing or two about them. I'm fairly certain that if you were to ask them, "What can you say about your sister?" their replies would be something like, "She's a nerd," "She's a weirdo," or "She's useless." The last one would undoubtedly come from my mom. Our relationship is far from perfect.

    My relationship with my mom is strained. I'm not the ideal daughter like my twin, Jasra, and my other sisters. No matter how hard I try, I'm never good enough for her. I'm simply a problem child she wishes she never had. Sometimes, I find it hard to believe that she actually gave birth to me.

     However, it's a different story with my father. In fact, it's the complete opposite. He and I are like best friends. He and I are like best of friends. He is the one person on this planet I know would stand for me till death. He loves me more than anything else in this world. I am not saying this because he tells me every second and minute we are together rather I am saying this because he has shown me.

He speaks about me like I'm the best thing that has ever happened to me, he looks at me with So much love and adoration I see it in his eyes, he protects me like I'm an egg. Sometimes I can't help but wonder why?. If the woman that birthed me feels irritated by my mere presence then why would he love and accept me the way he does. Somethings I can never wrap my head around.

     Another laughter resonated through the house dragging me out of my train of thoughts. I sighed remembering why they are all around. My grandmother Addah mama is coming today from Adamawa, my home town. And she would be living with us because my father does not trust the fact that she is living all alone there so he decided it's best she come stay with us. But technically speaking she isn't living all alone because they're maids and the house is heavily guarded.

     I hear the honking of the car outside and I immediately knew she had arrived but the knock on the door just proves me right.