Stranded Love

Going Around In Circles

DAY TWENTY-SIX

JJ had awoken some time during the early morning of the twenty-sixth day. It was still pitch black out and the moon had moved behind some forming clouds. He was lying on his back and tiredly rubbed at his eyes, yawning widely.

Similar to when he came to his senses after falling from the tree, JJ realised that his head moved up and down to the rhythm of someone else's breathing. He took a moment to make sure he wasn't still half asleep before having felt it again and glanced to his left. He recognised Kie's curls immediately.

Even with the moon gone, JJ still admired her.

He traced those defined cheekbones and sharp eyebrows and found himself counting the new highlights that streaked through her formally darker hair. He cherished the tranquillity of her expression – at least he thought that tranquillity meant calm and peaceful. Despite that, he listened to her patterned breathing and focused on the rising and falling of her stomach, sort of like he did when she was sick except he wasn't lying his head on her. Finally, his eyes fell to her lips and he instinctively swallowed. They looked soft and he fleetingly wondered how Pope and John B thought they felt when they kissed her.

JJ quickly abandoned that trail of thought. All it would've done is made him feel even more defeated and worthless than he already does. He knows he'll never know what they feel like against his lips. Wishful thinking would get him nowhere. He needs to shut them down.

He may be all about denial, but the Maybank boy refused to deny the beauty of his best friend. He isn't blind to what was in front of him. Kiara Carrera was, is, attractive as hell.

Yep, he's pussy-whipped indeed.

JJ laid there before he came to his senses and realised how painfully his back ached from the hard sand below. For the rest of the night he definitely wanted to sleep by the smouldering fire and on the slightly more comfortable frond mat instead of the cold sand down the beach.

He pulled himself upright and peered down at the sleeping girl, taking another short moment to treasure her stillness. JJ knew he couldn't let Kie sleep here for the rest of the night. He would never leave her out here on her own. So with that in mind, he bit back any hesitation at the idea of close contact or the possible result of her waking up and slowly scooped her up, an arm under her legs and another supporting her back. Her head fell against his shoulder which made his breathing stall.

Kie didn't wake up when he returned to the camp with her in his arms. Even though she was sound asleep, he felt incredibly nervous and his heart was racing. But JJ also felt so goddamn relaxed, like how in the actual hell did that work? The girl makes him so fucking giddy, which no Tourons have ever made him feel, but he also felt as if he had taken a drag and he was chilled the fuck out. His head was and is a mess in more ways than one.

JJ crouched down in front of Kie's mat but hesitated. He found his gaze checking to see if any of the other Pogues were awake and then he observed Kie as well to see if she was still unconscious. Then in a rare and sudden show of intimate affection – which scared him – he pressed a feather kiss to her hair before placing her onto her sleeping mat. He didn't know what encouraged it. Maybe it was because she was asleep and wouldn't know he did it and neither would the others. What they don't know wouldn't hurt them.

But JJ was terrified how easily it came over him. Fuck, you need to get control of myself. You can't lose her and doing this would make that happen. Imagine if you had gotten caught.

So JJ barely slept for the rest of the night. All he could think about was what if Kie felt him kiss her or one of the other Pogues saw it happen. Something always manages to go wrong because when it comes to JJ Maybank everything seems to become a shitshow or a disaster waiting to happen. He's overthinking it and hitting himself for doing something so impulsively stupid. He just might've put so much in jeopardy because he let his strong feelings get the better of him.