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Oh my god. Oh my god? Oh my god!? Oh my god..
As he leaned in to kiss me again I pulled myself away. He then pulled back as well, thinking what he did was wrong and out of line.
"I don't know if we should be doing this—I mean..I just.."
"I know what you mean. I'm sorry I shouldn't of done that." He tried to brush it off as if he wasn't upset or confused, the look in his eyes told a different story though.
"It sounds stupid but, I'm scared that if we start things again they'll just fall apart again." My hand slowly moved away from his, I don't know what I want him to do. Either just agree and let go of this, or keep me and tell me that things will be better. I want the second option.
"Then maybe we shouldn't do this, just go back to being friends. You're right, we shouldn't do this again." He then pressed a button making a "click" sound which unlocked his car, which was telling me to leave.
"Scara.."
"You don't have to say anything, Y/n. Really, we're just both scared I guess. We didn't even get to have a proper relationship before someone ruined it." He sighed, his hands tightening around the wheel. "Maybe that just was our sign we shouldn't be together."
I didn't know what to say, it was like he took the words out of my mouth. I only just slowly nodded my head, then opening the door, thanking him for the night, and walked back into my complex to get out of the rain.
As I laid in bed I could only stare up at the ceiling, wondering if what happened was only a dream. Or if I could take back those few moments and say what my heart wanted and not what my mind wished.
I missed his touch, now that he was gone again. I wanted him to come back, I wish I hadn't said anything to him at all and just let him kiss me.
Soon my phone lit up with a notification from him,
Scaramouche ☹️
Today, 10:55pm
Sorry abt tonight.
Don't be sorry it was my fault lol I shouldn't of said anything
I worry too much lmao
So did you want the kiss to happen?
Would it be stupid of me to say yeah?
No I was hoping you would say that
So what do we do now?
I don't know, you tell me we shouldn't get back together so I don't know
