WHAT HAPPENS TO THE HEART

THEN.I

Part I: As we break through the clouds

THEN. I

"You ever think about the Priority Queues at the airport? What if, one day, everyone gets the Priority pass to get in early? Like – everyone! And then you're left with no one waiting at the regular queue. They're all priority. So how do you prioritize? Is there really a point for it? You buy the pass but you need to wait with everyone. Maybe they let you in - first come, first served. Or maybe they move you in an alphabetical order. Or by the number of your seat. Wouldn't you feel ripped off? I would! I'd like to get my money back. Move me to the regular queue. It's the exact damn thing. Or maybe you turn things around. If it's just a couple of regular queuers and the rest are priority - get the regulars in first, and then the priority queuers. That'd be karma for being an arrogant prick trying to outplay the system. What's the point, anyway? They're all getting in the same damn plane, it's not leaving without you. You know what, I would never go for the pass."

I heard her say all that but I couldn't follow. Couldn't process. She noticed immediately:

"Where are you right now?"

"Huh?" Suddenly I was back.

"You were SO far away. You couldn't hear a word I said."

I blinked a couple of times. I looked back at her in confusion. She was smiling, staring at me lovingly, probably trying to identify any signs of intelligence on my face. That was Nat alright, always giving me the benefit of the doubt.

"Not THAT far away. I was following you along with your stories...from...eh...work!"

"Yeah, sure!"

"For real! Just ask me a question from what you just said."

"Forget it, guy, we're not playing that game again. You're only going to get embarrassed. I win this one. No question what-so-ever!"

"Now that's just unfair," I said, standing up from our breakfast table. She giggled. She was right, though. "You eating that?" She nodded so I picked up her plate and dropped it in the sink

I drifted off again, while I was slowly cleaning up the plates.

"So where were you?"

To this day, I couldn't tell you what was going on with me that morning. It wasn't the sort of thing that I did regularly.

"God, you just did it again! My guy, is everything alright?"

I tried to snap out of it:

"Everything's fine. I'm just tired I guess..."

"Yeah, you are," she smiled as she groped my butt. I threw her one of my flirty looks. She backed off, hands up:

"Down boy, we have work to do today. I just showered. You're not getting me in there again," she nodded towards the bedroom.

"You have work to do. I'm just tagging along," I replied, biting my lip sensually (my word, not hers).

She giggled and dashed from the room.

Me and Nat. At that point we'd been together for three years or so. We were happy, we were cool. We were in a comfortable zone. Happy home. Decent sex. Decent jobs. Fairly healthy. You know...just a couple of 30-something year olds trying their best to be happy.

Mean people would jump to say that we were vanilla, basic, mundane. That would be so mean. We were so much more than that. Or...you know what, screw that. Maybe we were vanilla and kind of boring but regardless, we were happy...and for that moment, it was enough.

Shortly after, things would end up turning to complete and utter shit. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

We were happy. We had loved spending time together from day one. We still loved doing that. And we were always looking for new stuff to do together. Did we have our issues? For sure. We weren't aliens. We were, you know, vanilla. Just happy vanilla. Satisfied vanilla. Contented vanilla. We were ok.