My wedding is scheduled tomorrow. It is a day I dread and look forward to equally. I think I might have started to like Raghavendra quite a bit and getting married to him does not seem like that much of a deal anymore. But it's the responsibility that comes with being his wife that I dread. Am I even good enough to be the wife of a Yuvraj? Will I be capable of being the queen someday?
I have hardly even lived as a Princess. This identity is alien to me. And so is living in a palace. I wouldn't know the first thing about such an important position. Should I just run away? I'm already the kingdom's shame, what harm can running away do right....from illegitimate princess I'll become the run away illegitimate princess. Actually, that will be a favour to this kingdom and they can live peacefully without gossiping about me. Yeah, this is perf-
My train of thoughts is rudely broken by my handmaiden, Suman. She is carrying a grand lehenga, looking like she is practically suffocating under the weight of it. I rush to help her.
"What is this for?" I ask breathily as we both put it down on my bed.
"Its for today's Puja. You know there is a puja hosted just before the wedding day to bless the bride and the groom and to clear any doshas in their kundali's before they start a new life together." She explains, smoothing down any wrinkles in the lehenga skirt.
"Oh yeah...I remember Radhika mentioned that yesterday. I guess I forgot. But why such a grand lehenga for a puja? I am sure something more simple will suffice."
Suman shakes her head furiously. "You already wear these....these simple village clothes all the other days, Rajkumari. Please don't argue even today. Today you have to look like the rightful wife of a Yuvraj and the princess of Saanchi. Today you will stop the room the second you walk in."
I sigh loudly. Clearly there is no room for argument today. Don't get me wrong I like dressing up just as any other person but the royal lehengas are incredibly grand, made of the finest silks and materials, they make me feel luxurious and fancy and that makes me feel out of place. Because inside I am just an ordinary girl from Kaniha. Honestly, a part of me thought that the minute I start living the royal lifestyle I will easily mold into it because it is in my blood or something but I've realised that was a stupid expectation. While I am grateful for all the luxuries of the palace and I do like utilising them, like the huge bath with the best body washes, a ton of doting staff who cater to my needs, the beautiful premises of the palace....but I always feel out of place here. I wonder if this feeling will ever go away.
"Okay ma'am. Whatever you say. Just tell me what to do and I'll follow." I mock curtsy to her. She giggles.
"Well you have to do nothing. Just sit and let me doll you up." She pushes me by my shoulder and forces me to sit down in front of the full length mirror, "I am so excited!" Exclaiming, she claps her hands. Looking at her enthusiasm I smile despite myself.
An hour later she is all done. I am donned in the grand green lehenga, my ears, neck and wrists loaded with heavy jewellery and my hair in a tight bun. It's customary for a married woman to keep her hair tied whenever she is making public appearance.
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