Knox's Little Annie

14

****TRIGGER WARNING**** 

(there will be mentions of assault in this chapter so please be weary if that may trigger you)

Serena was exceptionally worried when she got home and saw me sleeping. The dark eye bags and red-rimmed eyes didn't help my case either.

As soon as I woke up, she went on a long monologue about how maybe she was putting too much pressure on me all at once. I didn't bother to correct her - didn't bother to explain why I had actually been so worn out in the first place. It would take too much explaining that I couldn't stomach yet.

I felt bad about not filling her in but not bad enough to actually do it. I would tell her eventually, just not when it was still so fresh.

I still felt extremely guilty for how everything went down with Knox. The fact that I invited him into the house and then freaked out on him was humiliating. He deserves an explanation and I was aching to give it to him.

But for now I'd just have to wait with the promise that I'd see him tomorrow.

That night Serena made me my favorite spaghetti dinner and we stayed up well into the evening watching our favorite trashy reality tv shows. If anything, I was immensely grateful for the way that Serena knew how to get my mind off of things. Even when she didn't fully know what was going on, she always knew how to fix it and leave a smile on my face.

The next morning was a difficult one. I had slept well only in the sense that I had been so emotionally exhausted, I passed out immediately. As for everything else, nightmares plagued me the whole night to point where I felt almost more tired when I woke up than when I had first gone to sleep.

Serena started to invite me to run errands with her, but upon seeing my state suggested I take the morning to relax after all.

So, I did just that.

I took a long bubble bath, lit a candle, and played soft music as I tried to take my mind off the impending conversation with Knox. It had worked to an extent. My body felt thoroughly relaxed and there was thankfully no trace of paint from the day before. 

My mind, however, could not shake the trickles of anxiety that seeped their way in.

I was standing outside on the curb a couple hours later, waiting for Knox to pick me up like he had texted earlier. I fiddled with the sleeve of my cream sweater before brushing down the skirt of my white dress for the millionth time since I put it on. I straightened my necklace and pushed back my hair, shifting my weight as I spotted his car approaching.

As he pulled up the curb in front of me, I took a steadying deep breath before opening the car door. The air from his a/c hit my warm cheeks, already beginning to cool me down.

I felt bad when I avoided Knox's eye but I couldn't bare looking at his quite yet. Instead I zeroed in on my usually empty seat. My mouth parted slightly and my head tilted to the side in confusion. I glanced between the seat and Knox a couple times, trying and failing to process what this was about.

I noticed Knox suppressing a smile as he reached across the center console and picked up the bouquet of flowers so that I could sit down.

Swallowing thickly, I tried not to think about who they were for as I buckled myself in. Knox handed them back to me once I was situated - obviously not able to hold them and drive simultaneously. I bit my lip as I stared at the arrangement full of soft pink and white flowers.

An overwhelming sense of bitterness filled my body the longer I admired them.

"Whoever these are for must be lucky." The words left my mouth before I could stop them. I cringed internally as my voice sounded bitter even to my own ears.