Remus <3

28 Friends

Remus was upset. He knew why he was upset. It only made him loathe himself.

He trudged around Hogsmeade pretending he wasn't jealous. She hadn't shown remote interest in anyone for 2 years, she was waiting for Remus. And then it seemed hopeless so she decided to move on.

Now Remus was kicking rocks and wallowing in the same self pity that led him to this.

"I thought you'd be back at Hogwarts now?"

"What are we?"

"What do you mean?"

"I'm Rem. You used to tell me things you didn't tell Regulus, things you didn't tell Marlene. You go to a werewolf village once a month and you didn't tell me. You told Regulus over your werewolf friend. Why am I Remus now?"

"We're friends now Remus. I didn't treat you like a friend before, I treated you like a boyfriend. And that's not what we are so I stopped treating you like you were," Ash says.

"I wanted you to be safe, with someone who loved you and could afford you. Someone who could hold a job. Not a werewolf."

"I don't know why I stood up for werewolves for you. You've never done it for yourself. Lupin, YOU are the reason people see werewolves as monsters. And I'm done trying to convince you you aren't. Because I tried, and after 5 years, you don't see it and I'm done saying it."

"Is this because of Finn?"

"NO REMUS! GODRIC NO!" Ash yells in anger, "Remus... just. I'll see you later."

Later would be the full moon. He hated when she was mad at him. She made Lilly take up her prefect shifts with Remus. It was silent, Ash didn't so much as look at Remus. She fell asleep on Sirius. Remus watched Sirius's fond gaze and the way he wouldn't sleep out of fear Ash wouldn't be comfortable.

Remus wanted to be selfish. He wanted to get the girl, but what if... That was all he could think about. All the bad things that could happen. He often imagined Ash years down the line waiting for him on a full moon full of resentment because of how little he brought to the table.

"Padfoot."

"Prongs."

"Do you see that?"

"What?"

"On ash's neck," James points.

"...is that? A hickey?" Sirius looks closer, "does Ash have a boyfriend?"

"None she's told us about."

"Is it Regulus?"

"Regulus would be more discreet."

"Fabian?"

"Maybe. We'll have to ask in the morning."

Ash liked Finn, she really did. It's the reason she agreed to be his girlfriend. But the thing that bothered her was why she liked Finn. He reminded her of Remus but he wasn't Remus. Is that why she liked him? Yes. But they could be happy together.

Soon it was only Sirius and Remus awake. Remus was trying to sleep so Sirius thought he was asleep. But he wasn't so he saw Sirius moving so that ash could lay on him. So that she would be more comfortable. He saw Sirius move her hair out her face and the way he looked at her. He even saw Sirius kiss her forehead.

"Good night darling, I love you," he whispers to her before falling asleep himself. Remus could tell Sirius was uncomfortable. The way his head slumped made it obvious but Ash looked peaceful and that was all Sirius had cared about. Sirius would be good to Ash. Good for her, and that only made Remus angrier.