It wasn't often that Dabi came to Himiko small; usually she would have to spend copious amounts of time convincing the boy that it was okay to regress. She didn't mind that at all, because she knew the amount of trust it took him to be so vulnerable in front of her, or anyone for that matter. He wasn't exactly the most trusting person.
That is why, when the boy came to her room, tears in his eyes with a paci clutched tightly in his hand, she was surprised.
And then she was concerned. She ushered the boy into her room and he threw himself at the bed, clearly trying not to cry.
"What's up baby?" Her words were slow and gentle. She moved slowly as she closed the door, concious not to startle him. He curled further in on himself and Himiko took that as him not wanting to talk.
She sat beside him, gently taking the paci from his hand. His death grip around it losened and he sat up, staring at the girl. She held the paci towards his mouth and he happily bit into it. He smiled slightly before that sad look took over again.
"Mama!" The grabby hands he made said everything. She scooted closer and moved the boy into her lap, his back against her chest. She rested a head on his shoulder, placing soft kisses against his cheek and neck, each kiss earning a soft giggle. Her arms wrapped around the boys waist and she held him close, not wanting to ever let go. They stayed like that for a while, neither moving unless to tease each other with chaste kisses and tight hugs.
Dabi found interest in Himiko's hand, holding it in his own as though she'd slip away if he loosened his grip in the slightest. Himiko didn't mind. She liked the reassurance it gave, and she liked having him so close, where she could keep him safe from the world. Safe with her.
It might not always stay this way, but until it changed, she wasn't ever letting go. She'd make this last as long as she could.
It was moments like these that Himiko questioned how well she truly knew love. She thought love was to be so infatuated with something, so invested and obsessed that the only logical conclusion was to become it. Like the bird and then the boy. But then, with Dabi in her arms, trusting and vulnerable, those urges never came.
She didn't want to do any of that, she just wanted to hold him close and keep him safe and keep softly kissing his cheek. Perhaps thats what love is supposed to be. Sweet and gentle, cuddly and vulnerable, protective and simple and yet so confusing all at once.
Dabi snuggled further into Himiko's hold, pulling her arms tighter around his waist and pulling her from her thoughts. She lay him down as soft sleepy breaths escaped his lips and she cuddled up to him until he drifted off, seemingly happier than he had been when he entered her room. Emergency snuggles for the win.
