Anachronistic: Endless Masquerade

5 | The Hazards of Love - Part 2

- 5 -

        Lilith pressed her head into her knees and felt the teardrops roll down the inside of her legs. All she wanted was love. Instead, love was the only emotion she didn't feel. Fear, anger, pity, self-loathing? Sure, all there, mixing together until the colors blurred into a murky brown agony. But love? No one loved her; no one ever would.

        In that moment, Lilith's thoughts turned to her father. Her body trembled. It was unfair. When he found out, his love for her would evaporate, but she couldn't do the same. She would have to carry her love, all while it dug in and cut. Losing Victoria had sliced her open. Losing Joshua spread the wound. Losing Fennel and her father would tear everything out and leave her hollow. And she could already feel the tugging. She wanted to see them one last time, even if it killed her. So she sat in her prison cell and wept, even though the door was wide open.

        "Lilith?" The word struck her with her father's voice. A hallucination no doubt. He was still on the hunt after all. But then footsteps drew closer and the room lit up. Lilith looked toward the voice. A blurred figure stood holding a flickering candle. Her vision filtered through tears, but she still recognized the outline as her father. He set the candle holder on the table and moved towards her.

        "Dad, I'm sorry." She had to choke the words out between sobs. Her chin quivered until her jaw ached, but she couldn't hold it still now that he had arrived; now that he would see what she was. But then arms wrapped around her in a delicate but unmistakable hug.

        "No baby, I'm the one who's sorry."

        Lilith squeezed her arms around her father with all the strength her new body had to give. He tensed against the force, then tightened his grip as well.

        "I don't know what I did. What I..." A hand rested atop her head and gently stroked it. Her body fell loose and she whispered, "Dad, what am I?"

        Gregor took her under the chin and lifted until her eyes met his. She snorted, trying in vain to draw snot back up into her head. It had long since run down her face, over her lips, and dripped off onto her chest, mixing with tears the whole way down. He wiped her with the sleeve of his shirt, to little effect.

        "I have a lot to tell you, a lot to explain, but before any of it, I need you to know that you are my daughter and I love you no matter what. Nothing you can do will ever change that."

        Lilith leaned back into her father's chest where the tears returned in force. He wouldn't abandon her the way Joshua had. The wound at her heart started to close, just a bit.

        Gregor stood, pulling Lilith to her feet as he went. "Come with me. I need to pack, but I promise I'll explain everything." Lilith took her father's hand and followed him into his bedroom, though it hardly looked the part. More like a library with a bed shoved in the corner. Bookshelves lined the walls, each one filled to the brim with descriptions of youkai and the tactics needed to kill them.

        "The truth is you were 6, maybe 7 years old when I first met you."

        "But how? Did you and Mom separate before she gave birth?"

        "Not exactly." Her father's voice faltered, his words seemed unsure. He set his satchel down on the bed and flipped the bag open. "I've been hunting for a long time, Lilith. I spent years hunting in Lunden before I ever moved out here; rose up the ranks."