First Thoughts

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(A/N: This story is set in real life. There was a picture in the thumbnail but you know Wattpad *sighs* Sorry for the delay, hoping this makes up for it, as always :P)

"Is he gonna be ok?" "I hope so. I think he had a panic attack or something...he has quite a few issues." Ian looks so miserable. He obviously cares more than anything for his brother. My heart wrenches when I look at Derp. I can't believe the actual Derp SSundee is lying in front of me. But my god he looks ill. He's pale, twitching restlessly. "What happened to him?" Ian crosses his arms looking at the floor. "A lot of stuff dude. Depression mostly. He's still suffering now." "Why?" "Our father died about 5 years ago now. Our mother never cared for Derp, so our dad was his only caring parent. When he died Derp was heartbroken." I gently brush the hair back off Derp's forehead, sighing sadly. I felt this weird affection towards this man, a sudden, hot determination to help him in any way I could. "Why didn't your mum care for him?" "My mum was kind of obsessed with perfection...and, with no offence to Derp, everyone saw him as less than perfect. Perhaps average. So he was made an outcast in the family. Then they found out he was gay and-" "He's gay?" Ian narrows his eyes at me. "Yes. Does that matter?" My eyes widen at his hostile reaction. "No! Of course not; I'm not homophobic..." Ian raises his eyebrows, smiling knowingly before leaving the room. I sit on the edge of Derp's bed, stroking his nose with the back of my index finger. I want his eyes to open again. His breathtaking, icy blue, crooked eyes. The more I think about him, the faster my heart beats. Perhaps this is what real love feels like?...

I take hold of his cold hand, wanting to warm him again. Life has been so cruel to him, I want to make it better. His eyes finally open, their beautiful crooked iris' shimmering in the light as he turns his head to look at me. "C-Crainer?" I smile. "Hey dude. How you feeling?" "Terrible. But that's normal for me." His voice is croaky and worn, his face haggard as he yawns, sitting up. "Where's Ian?" I lift one shoulder. "Downstairs I think. So it's just us." Derp nods, lying back down. He shivers a little, muttering. "Cold." I lay down beside him and hesitantly put my arms round him. He leans his head against my chest. Funny, this doesn't seem awkward at all... "Better?" He laughs weakly. "Better." I looks down at him as he tilts his head back, gazing up at me. There is just something about him. Something that makes my heart and head pound. He sits up, leaning his head on mine. "So, you used to live in Denmark, right?" I nod, my heart aching for the snowy country of its birth.

"Yeah. I came here to...start over. Sophie and I ended on a pretty sore note." Derp nods, sighing. "I know how that feels." I smile a little as he batts at my fringe playfully. "Leaf hair." I laugh. "Yeah...it hasn't been tamed for a while." "I'll say." I look round, seeing Ian leaning against the doorway. I smirk. "I find that ironic coning from Mr. Ponytail over there." He rolls his eyes. "Haha, very funny. So are you staying the night or what?" I blink. "Um. I don't wanna intrude on your hospitality any longer-" "Can he stay Ian? Pleeeeeeeease?..." I look over at Derp; his crooked eyes wide and hopeful. Ian smiles. "I really don't mind dude, it's up to him." I smile too. "Um, well, as long as it's cool with you guys-" Derp hugs me tightly. "Yay!" I gasp a little, grinning. I haven't seen this side of Derp until now, the childish, fun loving side. The side I hope to bring out. Then he withdraws and I see his pale hands, feel his cold skin. He seems so...hurt inside. I want to fix him. Ian swivels round and leaves the room. "We have a spare room Crainer! We can make a bed up for you and stuff. Where are you staying at the moment?"

I reluctantly stand up from the bed and go after him. Derp follows at my heels, making me blush. "I'm staying at a hotel nearby until I found a new place or apartment to stay in." "You could always stay with us?" I look round, Derp's hopeful face making me need to hide my darkening blush. "I don't know-" "Yeah! That's an idea Crainer! You could hang with us homie?" I rub my arm awkwardly. "I don't wanna intrude-" Ian reappears, grinning. "Aw c'mon Crainer, it's fine!" I smile nervously. "Well...as long as it's ok with you guys-" I'm practically suffocated in a tight hug from behind; my face burning as Derp giggles. "Now we can all play games together! Minecraft and...minecraft...and...I don't actually know any other games..." I laugh as Derp releases his grip, Ian having gone back into the room to make a start on the air mattress. "I'll teach you how to play some others! Lord of the rings and stuff like that." He smiles, the colours slowly returning to grey face and strained smile, dull crooked eyes starting to sparkle blue again. "I would like that." The main colour on my face is red as I smile bashfully in return before deciding to help Ian.
***
I stretch out on the air-bed, exhausted. I miss Denmark. I miss Sophie. The bed dips down on one side and I turn my head as Derp lies down beside me, wriggling as he tries to get comfortable. I smile and shut my eyes. "Do you miss home Crainer?" I nod, sighing.
"Yeah, I mean, I grew up there...everything is so...different in America. It's scary..." I feel his warm breath on me. "Yeah...the world is scary...that's why I don't go out there. People are scary." I sit up, looking down at him. "People?" He hides his face in his hands. "People stare at my eyes and say mean things about me." My heart softens with pity. "Well, as far as I'm concerned, there's nothing to stare at apart from your eyes and their beauty." I blurt the words out before registering them. My heartbeat speeds up though as I saw one crooked eye peeking out from between Derp's fingers, gazing right at me. "Y-you mean that? People always say my eyes are scary and ugly and should stay hidden..." I lie back down beside him and take hold of his wrists, removing his hands from his eyes. "There we go, that's better. Nothing that unique and special should be hidden Derp." His small smile and faint blush make my heart skip a beat. "You're really nice Crainer." I smile back. "Well, Ian is too." Derp nods, still gazing at me. "Yeah but, you're different. Like me." I hide my blush with my arm. "Ha, yeah, t-two of a kind huh?" He hugs me. "I hope so, then I won't be alone anymore." I hug him back, entwining my fingers over his lower back. "I'll make sure you're not alone anymore." He nuzzles into my neck, his voice a hoarse whisper in my ear. "Thankyou."
***
Crainer is different. He really is. No one else can lock gazes with me and make me weak at the knees. No one else can make my heart pound with simply a smile. I only met him this morning but I feel something so strong for him I can barely contain it. He blushed a lot earlier, like maybe, just maybe...he feels the same emotions. It's getting dark outside as I breathe in Crainer's soothing scent. He smells like cinnamon. It makes my head spin. "Hey Derp?" His voice; the accent making it unique. "Yes?" "I'm uh...kinda hungry..." I pull away, his hands dropping to my waist briefly before he withdraws them, looking away shyly then locking gazes with me again; my skin tingling. "O-ok. You want dinner?" He nods a little. "Yeah. I kinda need to get my stuff from the hotel as well though, as long as you guys are still cool with me staying here...?" I'm compelled to hug him again and do so, a little tighter than before to see how he reacts to it. "Trust me Crainer, I for one am delighted you're here." Crainer smiles. "No more loneliness Derp. Not while I'm here." I go back to his neck, closing my eyes in contentment. Please don't ever leave~

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