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Perfect - Lo'ak

Heyy.
ask for this request. It's shorter than my other ones.
Sorry for the long wait. I hope you like it. 🥰
I'm working on the other requests. I try to write them as soon as possible. Sorry you have to wait for so long.

Y/n POV
Lo'ak and I have been best friends since we were very young. He was my first and only friend and I was to him. Then I got to know his siblings and I got along with them. I had no other friends besides them. It was always hard for me to make friends. It was a lot of time to open up to Lo'ak. But after I trusted him completely, I opened up to him and our friendship became closer. We were always there for each other at any time and had a lot of fun together. That was until we grew up. Lo'ak became very handsome and strong and became a warrior. Although for me, Lo'ak has not changed anything. I always thought of him as a strong and handsome man. And I'm just... me. As Lo'ak got older, the girls became interested in him. Before that, they never cared what happened to Lo'ak, they always found me an outsider. Then he became a warrior and became stronger and more handsome, suddenly all girls began to be interested. Until now, they always saw Lo'ak as a freak because of his hands. Now, all of a sudden, everyone is touching his hands. Lo'ak doesn't mind it in the slightest, and even enjoys being adored. But I was always here for him, and his hand was one of the things I loved about him. Actually, I loved everything about him. Soon, after we met, I began to feel more than friendship for him. And as the years passed, that feeling only grew. I never said anything to Lo'ak about my feelings for him. I preferred to keep it to myself. Lo'ak doesn't love me the way I love him. Why would he like me? I'm not special. I'm completely average. So, I pushed my emotions away. Because of my feelings, I didn't want to ruin our friendship.
As we grew up, Lo'ak spends less time with me than he used to. Other times, we always did almost everything together. And now Lo'ak enjoys the company of other girls several times. Sometimes I see girls touching Lo'ak and he touches the girls a lot. Maybe I'm jealous. But I can't help it once I fell in love with him during this long time. But he doesn't feel that way. But I wish he felt the same way I feel. I wish he could touch me like he touched those girls. Or I could touch him. What would it be like to be with Lo'ak? What would it be like to walk holding hands with him? How would his lips feel on mine? His lips must be very soft. But unfortunately, this only lives in my imagination.
Slowly, I began to compare myself to the girls Lo'ak spends time with. They are all much skinnier and more beautiful than me. That's why Lo'ak loves them so much. If I was skinnier, maybe Lo'ak would notice me. Maybe if I were prettier, Lo'ak would spend more time with me again. Maybe if I eat less than usual, I will become skinnier.
But that's still not at all. The girls are always envious of our friendship with Lo'ak. How much time we spend together. Therefore, they always try to take Lo'ak away from me. And if one of them succeeded, the others stay there so that I will definitely not see him for a while. Then, when Lo'ak is far enough, they say some hurtful words to me.
"Do you seriously think Lo'ak will ever love you?" asks one.
"Come on. Look at yourself. What do you look like? You're not thin and not beautiful at all," said another.
"Lo'ak will never love you. Never. You can try any way. You don't deserve Lo'ak anyway. He's too good for you," said a third, and tears began to cloud my vision.
"Oh... She's crying. We hurt her feelings. What a little crybaby she is. Look," said the first again.
"Now listen carefully to me. Lo'ak will never ever love you, so stop trying. Did you understand? If you had a chance, don't you think Lo'ak would have done something," said the second girl.
"Everyone knows you're in love with him. But Lo'ak doesn't feel the same. Everyone knows that, too. You might as well forget about him," said a third with a smile.
I haven't been able to listen to them further. Not anymore. With tears in my eyes, I ran home. And in to my marui and I just cried. Now I really need to lose weight.
Over the next few days, I tried to eat as little as possible, but nothing has changed yet. I still don't have a perfect body, even though I've been trying to lose weight for a week now, but I don't think I've managed to lose any weight. I still look the same. I always skipped breakfast, saying I had eaten a lot the night before and I didn't need anything now. I always ate little for lunch. If anyone, especially my parents, asked me why I didn't eat more, I would say I had eaten recently or that I wasn't hungry now. Dinner was the only time I ate properly during the day. Maybe it's the problem and I should skip dinner too.
It's been more than a week since I decided to skip dinners. But it still hasn't changed anything. If this is going to go on, I will be doing this unnecessarily. But others always lose weight if they don't eat that much, and I don't. Maybe if I ate even less for lunch, it would be easier. Lo'ak will never really love me if I don't lose weight. How can others have such a beautiful body? Even if they eat a lot. Why am I not like them? I used to have the same good appetite, but not so much now. Although sometimes I always want to eat more. But if I do, it's all for nothing. Luckily, I don't get as hungry now as I used to. Now I don't crave food so much.
The problem is that by eating less, I lost almost no weight. Maybe I should do something else? Lo'ak still sees me as nothing more than a friend. Maybe it's not just my weight. Maybe it's the way I look. The other girls are much prettier than me. But I can't change that. I can't change much about my look.
More days passed. Still with no change. Lately, there are times when I can't look at food. It makes me sick. But besides, I have been feeling sick many times in recent days. I often felt dizzy and sometimes had small black dots dancing in front of my eyes for a few moments, but I never paid too much attention to these little things. I sighed deeply as we walked with Lo'ak. Why do Lo'ak have to be perfect? Why do other girls have to be perfect? Why am I not like the other girls? Will Lo'ak really never love you? Thoughts like these were swirling in my mind.
"What's wrong?" asked Lo'ak.
"There's nothing wrong. Why?" I lie to my best friend.