can't we just go back? | pokémon

twelve | worries and reminders

"winona, how long will you be staying at unova?" her juniors asked her.

tomorrow night is their flight to unova and it'll be a long 8-hour flight from hoenn to unova. she has been preparing and arranging her luggage she'll be bringing with her. wallace also reminded everyone to choose which pokemon they'll be bringing with them them at handy. obviously there are centers in each town but he reminded them than planning beforehand in case something bad were to happen is much better.

"i believe it'll be.. two weeks. it won't be that long, i'll be back before you all notice i'm gone," she said, smiling at them. winona realized that hoenn's gym challenges will be put on hold for two weeks while they're gone. she wonders if it will greatly affect the tourism of their region and if there's any way they can do something about it. but she quickly realized that she doesn't know who to talk to about it. she can bring this issue to the chairman but he's been extremely busy lately, attending to several meeting of the pokemon league and the association. her best option is wallace but then again, she doesn't really want to talk to him and she doesn't know what wallace can help with other than to maybe let him bring it up himself to the association which is also highly unlikely since wallace is also busy. winona internally sighed.

back then, winona loved pitching her ideas to meetings and it made her so happy seeing it come to life. she always put her people and other people's well-being before hers. as she grew older, she pitched in more ideas that not only focused on specific group of people, but also catered to people of all ages.

her juniors couldn't help but tease her more saying that they'll miss her defeating challengers left and right, stomping them down with her mighty pokemon. she laughed and let them rest after a hard day's work. she recently defeated a challenger just this afternoon after having a cup of tea. she already defeated 4 challengers today and she's surprised that the late afternoon isn't as busy as usual. usually, trainers would swarm either late in the morning or late in the afternoon until evening before they close.

she decided to rest in her office's small bedroom. her small, minimalist room is where she stayed at most of the time when she would overwork herself after her break-up with wallace. when she overworked, she would rest here for a while. but when she needed a good cry, she would mostly run back home and stay in her bedroom there. sometimes, when her feelings are too heavy for her to bear and that she couldn't bring herself to get out of the gym and let people see how miserable she looked, she would stay here in her small, pale blue-colored room.

she held her pokenav close to her face, thinking if it really was right to -- even just for that moment -- say what she was thinking just like before, several years ago where she would tell wallace her ideas. contemplating whether or not to call, winona sighed and put her hand down, the screen showing wallace's contact number. she really wanted to but it felt so wrong, like she has no rights to do something she used to do because they don't have the relationship they had several year ago.

what right had i when i was the first to leave? what right had i when i was the first to give up?

winona knew wallowing in regret won't get her anywhere but at the same time, she doesn't really know what to do. it felt like all the years of her trying her best to build herself again wasn't helping at all. was she really worthy of all these things after what she had done to wallace? winona suddenly felt sick to her stomach.

as she lied on her bed, she closed her eyes, hoping that her tired body will let her fall asleep.

as soon as she felt like she was slipping to dreamland, her pokenav vibrated and she immediately opened her eyes.

"winona?"

winona's eyes grew wide as she stared at her pokenav screen. she didn't notice that her finger pressed the call button on wallace's number. her heart went into panic mode as she heard wallace ask why she called.
"o-oh, uhm.. sorry," she muttered.

"what?"

"i.. i'm sorry for calling without prior notice,"

"no, it's fine. what's up?"

"i hope i didn't bother you or anything,"

"no, don't worry. what is it?"

winona thought of anything she can ask wallace, just to cover up the embarrassment of calling him and her having to explain what in the world just happened when she fell asleep.
"i was wondering.. if the leaders going to unova will lead in a small drop in the tourism for two weeks.. since we all know that gym challenges play a significant amount in the tourism of hoenn," winona said.

winona heard wallace chuckle from the other line.

"oh, so that's what you are thinking about? don't worry much about it, winona. two weeks isn't too much. plus we'll all be training at unova too, so gym challengers should expect that we'll come back stronger than before,"

winona hummed. she has nothing more to say. or rather, she didn't know what to say when she was just thinking about him a few moments ago.
"yes, that would be all," was all she could say.

before winona could bid him farewell, wallace spoke and asked her a question.
"what was that?"

"i was asking if you have eaten dinner yet,"

dinner.. winona thought. she swiftly glanced at her wall clock and saw that it was already half past 9 pm and she hasn't eaten her dinner yet.
"no, i haven't. i forgot," 

winona heard wallce click his tongue once.
"why do you always forget to eat your meals?" he asked.

"i'm sorry, i'll eat something now, don't worry," winona answered without thinking much about it. only then did she realized what she said and she felt embarrassed.

"you better eat something now. i'll be hanging up so--"

"wallace,"

"hmm?"

"thanks for reminding me like you used to. i still tend to forget and eat meals late. i'm sorry you had to be the one to do that instead of doing it myself,"

"don't worry. i should get going now and you should eat your dinner. good night,"

"good night, wallace," winona said before hanging up.

she put her phone on top of her bedside drawer and closed her eyes. the quietness made her hear her loud heartbeat and she's pretty sure it's because of their flight to unova tomorrow night.