𝙨𝙤𝙗𝙚𝙧. •Tom Kaulitz•

6

It's Tuesday morning and i haven't slept. I smoke another cig after i'm all ready for school, putting the box back in the secret weed drawer. The joints that i have in there sat staring at me, and i decide to grab one and put it in my jean pocket making sure to keep it intact.

"Hey Anni." I smile at her, she met me half way again then we walk together to school.

I walk just before first period and ofcourse i see Tom with a girl and Bill writing in his notebook, probably writing some songs. I really should check them out one day.

I sit in my seat and just lean my head down, i reek of the weed, i need to get rid of it. I ask around the class if they've got a lighter, they don't bother questioning why but no one has any.

I sit back down about to message Anni, "Hey girl i've got one." The girl on Toms lap says, her lips red and puffy as if they were making out right in the middle of class. Gross.

I don't bother looking at her or tom and just grab the lighter, "thanks." I rush out the class and see my teacher walk in. Now i cant go back after i've smoked.

I walk to the back of the school and sit on a near by curb, and smoke; coughing at the first puff, but then getting used to it. My throats burning as if it's on fire. I forgot a drink. Then i stand up to throw the end bit to a near by grass and rub my heel on it.

Now i'm sitting in the girls toilets, grabbing a marker from my pocket and drawing on the door. Writing my name: " Amelia K🤍 " I also draw a couple of stars around it for fun.

I sit on the closed toilet and look at the time, It's break? That was fast. I hear Anni come in and i come out the cubicle, "Hey Anniiii"

"Ami? Are you high?" She laughs abit and comes closer to me, "yep you are." Guess she could smell it. She grabs a body mist from her bag and sprays me all over, some of it getting in my mouth.

"ew gross." I spit into the sink to get rid of the taste, i know i'm gross aswell.

"you need to sit down, your all over the place" She wraps her arm around me and walks me out and we bump into Romeo.

"who do we have here" He smiles down at me and i look up, "thanks for disappearing at the party"

"oh shit." I try to stand up straight, "i'm so sorry i just was like, you saw, right, yeah okay bye" I ramble on and let Anni drag me to my class room.

"Okay sit." She pushes me onto the chair and i nearly fall back, "shit i cant even get you at lunch, i need to do some weird shit for sport. Erm you know bill and Tom? they can help you?"

"no no no no" i protest, but too late Bill walks in and she walks straight over and says something to him but can't figure out what. He looks over her shoulder and i smile with teeth, as a joke ofcourse.

"give her some water." Is all i hear then she leaves. Bill walks over to me and spins his seat around to sit down facing me, "now what's up with you?"

"Fuck off Bill." I lay my head on the table again, i want to sleep.

"Nope, no you're not sleeping," He gently lifts my head up, "drink water." He hands me a bottle.

"No i don't want to." I stand up from my seat and attempt to walk out, when i'm nearly there Tom comes in with a new girl and i bump straight into him.

"Watch it creep." She says and i look straight at her, my eyes red and half closed and say, "don't talk to me you whore."

"Chill Ami what the fuck?" Tom backs her, "No you don't get to call me Ami anymore," I turn around to Bill, "neither do you." and i walk out.

To get out of the school i need to walk past the front office, and i'll get questioned. So i speed walk past, "Young lady where do you think you're going?" Ignore.

I make it out and i go to the mini lake that's near the field again, i love that spot. I love hearing the nature around me when i'm high, or anything for that matter. It calms me.

My dad rings me.

"Ami ty gdzie? school called." (Ami where you?)

"I'm at the park tato. I just needed some space." (dad)

"Don't say this is starting again. Amelia i swear to god." I can hear him get angry over the phone. I don't want him to be angry.

"it's not dad. go back to work." i rub my eye with my left hand, wish i could say i regret everything but this is the only thing keeping me going. And he hangs up.

I haven't seen my dad properly for quite some time, the only time i see him is weekends, he has night shifts so he always leaves before i come back from school and he comes back home when i'm asleep, well "asleep".

I've been sat here for an hour or two, so i decide to go home and sleep.

—

I don't go to school for the rest of the week, i don't want to. Got a couple of missed calls from Anni and an unknown caller but i don't answer.

I turn on my tv and it's playing some live concert, the camera angle changes and i see Bills face singing "monsoon" I never knew they were this good, well i didn't even know if they were good at all.

The camera angle changes one more and it's Georg and Tom playing guitar, i turn my tv off. I don't want to see them.