The Secrets We Keep

Old Enemies

We continued our walk, but didn't talk. Our shoulders brushing every few minutes. I wished our conversation could've ended differently. I wished he'd been able to say it. But he couldn't, and I had two choices. Be upset and end it, or let him work that out on his own. I didn't want to let him go, yet; I wasn't ready for that so I'm choosing to wait for him. I'd wait for him to be ready, or if he could never say it...I'd still be here. He can find other ways to say it. "Not much further, now." I surprised my own self when I spoke. I was on autopilot. I kept walking, but Daryl stopped.

"River," he reached for me. "Come here."

He didn't have to tell me twice. I almost ran to him. He pulled me into a tight embrace. "No matter what happens when we get there...we are in it together. This isn't on you. We can fix it...together." I pulled back and studied his face. He always looked so relaxed when we were this close. I brushed his messy hair from his eyes.

"Thank you." Then I kissed him and he kissed me back. His hands pushing me closer to him. I ended the kiss and pressed my forehead to his. "Ok, let's go." I took his hand and we continued. When we were about two miles away, we stuck to the woods for cover just in case anything was wrong. About a mile out I stopped us.

"What's the plan?" He asked. I was grateful that he was letting take point.

"Let's stay quiet and try to get closer to the gate before we make ourselves known." He nodded. "If it feels safe, we'll come out. I know and trust most of the guards." I made sure my knives were where they should be and readied my gun. "Ready?" I asked him.

"Ready."

We set off, even quieter than before. Nothing seemed out of place or suspicious. I could see the gate, but I couldn't see anyone on the wall. I turned to Daryl and asked if he had sights on anyone, without words, only hand signals. He shook his head.

"I'm going out." I whispered so quietly only he could hear. He wanted to stop me, I could tell, but he controlled his impulse. I slowly stood and walked into the road. I took a few steps closer to the gate and about fifteen people popped up. Every weapon trained on me. I immediately dropped my gun and put my hands up. I recognized the man in the middle.

"Toby! It's me River!" I shouted.

"I don't give a shit! You were supposed to be here yesterday!" He was screaming at me. I noticed dark smoke coming from inside. My heart rate picked up and my brain went to the worst case scenario.

"Toby! What's going on? Did someone attack? Where is Lita? Is anyone-anyone" I couldn't get a good breath. It was about to happen again.

"Who the fuck is that? Put your weapon down, now!" I turned to see Daryl walking slowly to me.

"He's with me!" I was able to squeak out. I heard his crossbow scrape the road, then he was next to me. A hand on my elbow to steady me.

"Breathe." He whispered. I used his touch to tether me back to reality and my breathing became deeper.

"Where is Lita? Let us in! We can help." I pleaded with Toby.

"Lita is hurt." A female voice said from behind Toby. Pain hit my chest again. Daryl tightened his grip.

"Helen, get back."

"Toby, let them in. Lita trusts them."

"I-I can't. Not after last night. We can't trust anyone."

"LET THEM IN, NOW!"

The gate swung open and I ran. Daryl picked up our weapons and ran after me. "Where is she?!"

"At home." Helen called after me.

I ran through the streets, Daryl on my heels. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. The smoke was coming from structures and houses. I could see more smoke in the distance coming from the fields. There were piles of bodies, some fresh with faces that I recognized and some that had been dead for awhile. A breach? Did walkers get in somehow? I ran up the porch steps and into the house.