My Star Guide, Polaris (Oshi No Ko Fanfic) (Under Hiatus and Restructuring)

Emerging from Behind the Scenes

Miyabi Kurosawa POV
Tokyo, Japan
October 8, 2012

It is nearly 4 years since that incident, the one that made Ai leave and the moment I hurt her. I still regret that day, there wasn't a day I wasn't being slowly eaten up by guilt. It still haunts me even after nearly 4 years.

I've been doing financially well since my investments has skyrocketed and practically set me for life. It was a great achievement but it didn't hold any meaning to me, not without her. Our shared bank account and separate savings account has been continuously growing too, it's probably big enough to start a large business enterprise on its own.

Speaking of business, I've managed to invest large enough to become a large shareholder in multiple companies. I've also invested in other fields of interest like real estate, restaurants, fashion, sports, and car companies. Along that, I also invested in video game companies and social media apps. But all of that money still didn't stop me from doing what I've been doing up until now.

But this success didn't only affect me, it also affected Norio-san. Although he can retire now and live comfortably, he still decided to teach and run a library as a hobby, he has also made a very large chess club which also included me. The club was sponsored heavily by him and simply ran it as if it was a hobby.

But that didn't stop him from managing to develop young chess talent up to the candidate Master level. Being that I was also a member of the club, I had to compete in multiple international and world stages. After becoming one of the youngest grandmasters in chess at the age of 14 and winning a world championship, I stepped away from competing completely.

After that, I simply started to further focus on my education and investing in companies I found in my memories. After when I turned 14, I've finally made sense with the 'dreams' I've been having or rather memories. At first I was conflicted with who I really am, then I realized that we are simply the same person that simply had different circumstances in an alternate universe. I didn't need to fight the advantage I have and I can't keep doubting myself, to keep asking myself if my decisions were my own. I simply embraced it as my own and integrated it to be a natural part of me.

After that bit of enlightenment, I think saw the world much clearer. I gained more confidence, confident enough to advance 2 years in grade level. At first I was looked down upon by my classmates due to my age, but that changed over time after showing my capabilities and taking over the top spot in school. Society can be quite meritocratic after all.

I also started training in martial arts again but this time, with the help of professional coaches instead of training all by myself. I thought of training as way to instill discipline on myself and help me regain the confidence I've lost. It is also to help with my need and want to improve and rise up from the period of stagnation I went through.

All these years, I still made time to search for Ai and the company she had joined, causing me to deep dive in every agency that handles idols and such. At first, I fervently searched for her until I came to terms with myself and toned it down, after all, she might not recognize me as I drastically changed in terms of appearance and exerting a lot of that effort might make me look like a stalker. But, I still can't help but feel dread due to the 'dreams' of her eventual death, I can't let it happen, I can't lose the only remaining light in my life again.

It was also around right after I turned 14 that I found her, with her popularity rising up as an Idol in a group called B-Komachi under a company called Strawberry Productions. The president of the company is a man named Ichigo Saitou, the same man who scouted Ai. The group debuted when Ai was 12, I suppose that was right after I found out that she has dropped out of the school that the both of us were attending.