You Are Home [Hwang2Shin]

CH. 19

"Plaid pajama set or pink nightgown?" Yeji asks from her spot on your bedroom floor. She holds up both options as if you wouldn't be able to make the decision without visual aids. You smile, glad it goes without saying that you want to keep your Midzy tee safe at home. "Plaid." She tosses them to you and you take your time folding the top and bottoms before placing them in your backpack.

The last time you and Yeji packed a bag together she was "anx-cited" about going to California to meet with one of her graphic design clients. This time you're the one who's anx-cited -- and the one who's leaving. "So," Yeji says, "you gonna miss us?" You shrug one shoulder and focus on smoothing out a crease in the plaid fabric in your lap. "It's not far." "Mmmmhm." Yeji arches an eyebrow and presses her lips together. "Well, we're gonna miss you, I'll tell ya that." You roll your eyes and the two of you laugh and you try to sink into the comforting familiarity of the moment.

But the truth is you will miss them, more than you'd like to admit.

Ryujin walks you to Haewon's house. It's kinda silly, because it's just around the corner and you've walked there on your own plenty of times, but when Ryujin offered, you quickly agreed.

The plan has been in the works ever since you told Haewon that your moms want to adopt you. You were standing in the schoolyard during recess, bouncing on your toes to keep warm. After Haewon freed you from an extra-suffocating hug she told you, eyes shining with tears, that you have to tell her absolutely everything, but away from the busybodies at school. The only solution, of course, was a sleepover. So Haewon set to work concocting a detailed strategy to get her parents on-board and a few days later, when she gave you the all-clear, you simply asked your moms, who said 'yes' practically before you got the question out.

Ryujin squeezes your hand as Haewon's house comes into view and you wonder if she can feel the quickening thrum of your pulse. You squeeze back and try to snap yourself out of it. You're a child of the system who's slept in countless lumpy beds in homes run by some unsavory people. But Haewon's queen-sized bed is made of this magical material called "memory foam" and her parents are warm and cheerful, like their daughter, so you can't fathom why the thought of sleeping over makes you feel a bit queasy inside. It bugs you.

When you reach the doorstep Ryujin turns to you before ringing the bell. She cups your chin and waits for you to meet her eyes. "You're going to have a great time," she says, like it's a fact. "But if you ever want to come home just call. Even if it's the middle of the night, okay? We won't mind." You want to tell her you're not a wuss, that you've stayed in far worse places without having anyone to call in the middle of the night -- you'll survive one sleep in Haewon's fancy house.

Ryujin runs a finger over the crease that's formed between your brows, and you remember that if anyone understands the kind of nights you once endured, it's her. "Okay." The smile that seemed so far away just seconds ago spreads easily across your face. "I love you, Mum." "I love you too, Princess." You sink into the warmth of Ryujin's hug, wrapping your arms around her middle.

Then it hits you. "Oh no... I forgot! I got distracted by Waffles, and then the phone rang, and then it was time to go..." You pull away and glance down the street, wondering how long it'll take you to run back. "You forgot something?" Ryujin places a steadying hand on your shoulder. "What is it? I can go get it."

You shake your head, that queasy feeling setting back in. "I forgot to tell Ma I love her."

Just then the front door swings open and Haewon's mom appears behind it. "I thought I heard voices out here," she says, smiling at both of you. "Come on in, Yuna. Haewon's anxiously awaiting your arrival in her room." She cups one hand beside her mouth and switches to a stage whisper. "I believe I heard rumblings about a blanket fort."