I Can't Love You More Than This | Louis Tomlinson X Reader X Zayn Malik

Part 5: I Can't Love You More Than This

1 year later

"Do you really want to come with us, mate? It's fine if you don't, you know. It's not necessary" Niall suggested as I stood in front of the mirror and pulled on my blazer.

"Niall, I've come to the state of mind that I've lost her to him and that she's not comin' back to me anytime now. What's the use in hidin' and not comin' to their wedding and in turn showing her that I haven't forgotten her?" I asked. The four of them sighed in unison.

"Is that what matters now, Lou? Showing and letting her know you've forgotten her? She forgot you long back, mate. You're the one who hasn't let her go, and it's been two years" Harry replied.

"You know the date today?" I said.

"Uhm January 12th?" Liam replied.

"It's their birthday today. And the day the two of us started dating" I replied.

"What do you mean their birthday?" Niall asked.

"Y/N and Zayn. They both share the same birthdate" I explained.

They all just sighed again in dismay. Soon I found myself driving towards something I'd never wanted to witness. The love of my life's wedding. And to think it wasn't to me and it was to my best friend, wasn't believable to my mind and unprocessed to my heart, either. Zayn just plainly told me in twelve words, "We're getting married. She wants you there, be there if you want"

Initially, I didn't want to go. It was like inviting myself to the gates of hell. But I decided to go, cause I have four of these people who're here to support me, but to support the two of them as well.

When we finally reached the church, a question raised in my mind, Why were they getting married in a church? Zayn wasn't Christian. He never believed, as a first. I just shrugged as all of us got down. Religion never matters. It's the love that does, right?

The minute we got in I found Mrs Y/L/N, she was obviously crying. Her family never knew I was Y/N's boyfriend. I felt relieved to see someone who didn't know that at her wedding.

Just when I felt that was relieving, All four of them nudged me and made me turn towards someone. When I did I found Jelena Hadid, or well Gigi Hadid. And to my at most shock, Ashton Irwin. Seems I've got company to it. The two of them seemed happy enough to be at their ex's wedding. I guess the four of them wanted me to learn from the two, mainly Ashton, but I'd loved Y/N more than him to be glad to come to her wedding with someone else, who happened to be my best friend. It was hard. No one can handle my pain.

I didn't go with them to talk to Zayn. Instead I sat down next to Ashton.

"Hey" Ashton said once I sat down.

"Hey" I replied.

"Must be hard for you, huh? Y/N getting married to one of your best friends?" He asked. I gave him a sad smile, "I couldn't believe it when she told me, mate. I always thought you both would get married"

"So did I Ashton. I let her go man" I sighed.

"You shouldn't have come, Louis. It's just going to hurt" He told me.

I laughed, "What more hurt is it going to be for me than when I found out she was have an affair with my best friend behind my back?"

That moment, she walked in, everyone stood up, including me. My mind ringing that it was barely few minutes until she was actually Mrs Zayn Malik and was never going to Mrs Louis Tomlinson. As everyone looked at her, I turned to Zayn. His eyes showed the love he had on her, the very love she wanted, just pure love. Atleast she's happier, isn't she? I wasn't listening to anything the priest said. Or their vows. I wasn't ready to hear them anyhow.

I couldn't have been more sad than this moment. Right here, watching the girl I love move on real time. I stood there. Holding back my angry tears as she said "I do" and them exchanging their rings.

Nothing could prepare me today. To watch the girl I'm still in love with, move on in real time. The floor felt like it was caving as I watch the last 3 years of her and me get kissed goodbye. The lights were low, and she swayed with him back and forth to records we used to know, and she started to slow, And I watched it all from the front row. They're out there dancing, he's holding her closer now, he used to be me, and I'm here crying my eyes out.

Few hours later, I found myself to Zayn's room with the boys. I stood there. Silent and quiet as the four of them exchanged wishes. The three of them went out as the two of us stood there in awkward silence.

"You got lucky mate. Congratulations" I pushed myself to break the silence. More silence covered us.

"I'm sorry" He said out of the blue.

"For what?" I asked, even though I knew why.

There was more silence, "Louis? I don't think anyone told you... Y/N's pregnant. And though we love each other, I'm sorry for stealing your girl"

I looked down as the tears threatened to break out again, "She was never mine to begin with, Zayn. Guess she was always in love with you"

I turned to leave. Just then the door clicked open and Y/N walked in and gave me a smile. I simply smiled back, "Congrats"

"Thanks" She said with a soft smile on her face, "Glad you came"

I didn't reply. I didn't want to come, I wanted to say, but I didn't, and I headed for the door, just like she did. But I couldn't see her happy with another man, the man being my best friend, if I did, I'd die.

I got in my car, angry tears broke out from my eyes, as the memories came rushing in. Nothing's coming back anymore. None of the memories none of the moments. Y/N was Zayn's wife now, she was carrying his child and no one bothered to tell me. I drove back home, and destroyed it. Everything I owned was broken in the floor. Which included myself. I was on the floor, on my knees, doing the very thing I wanted to do ever since Y/N fell in love with Zayn. I screamed, I yelled, I cursed, lost myself to my anger. My house that she lived in with me for a whole year, shattered, broken, diminished and destroyed. I understood that moment why Félicité did drugs. I tossed and threw everything in her room to find Narcotics. I may be a Math professor but I was good at Science to know drugs.

Hours later, I finally found them.