Nct Dream || MOON

ch.6

The days following up afterwards were a blur.

You couldn't find it in you to do anything but try and forget. But the coldness of Jisung's hand lingered on yours and every single silence you forced on yourself reminded you of the boys' song.

Why didn't you come back after that night? The question circles in your head almost like a mantra, but you don't have an answer for it. Even when you do try to make up an excuse,your mind simply blanks out. And days simply kept passing on.

Your parents sent you a letter a little bit past noon today, but you simply tucked it away into your study's drawer and continued your lessons,making yet another uneventful day. And then,at night you try your best to not wake up, and for most of those nights you don't but tonight your eyelids fluttered open and the silence in your room is overwhelming.

The song doesn't play in the echoes of the manor like it usually did anymore ever since that night the boys began to argue, but it was there in the stillness of any room you would walk in, and the words of the song would somehow just float about freely in your mind. Absently occupying your thoughts.

You remember Renjun the most through it though. Somehow, that sad guilty look in his eyes seemed to have been engraved in your senses, and every single time you attempt to push any thought of the boys away, he always found a way back to you. You would even say you miss him at this point, if only you were brave enough to face what you did, then maybe you could go back and apologize.

But seeing them piece up the truth scared you to be honest. They were going on without any solid leads but the very thought of remembering brought out so much emotions from them, and you were always so clumsy with all that emotional charge. It was your sister who was more natural at handling that, be it comforting someone or merely sorting out what they felt. Being the youngest, you just stayed on the side and watched her handle such affairs.

So maybe that was it. The reason you suddenly bailed out on them. You weren't sure if you could carry such a responsibility. Mending people's worries and assuring them things would go well, how were you supposed to guarantee that when you yourself had no idea whether this whole ordeal was real or not?

"They feel real." You hear your own voice plead to your subconscious and it makes you shut your eyes and groan out in frustration.

That night, you refused yet again to answer their call and fell into another troubling slumber.

When you woke up the following day, you spent half your time in the library, browsing books after books in a senseless thought that you'd actually pick one up to read when you barely remembered their titles.

Until one actually did caught your attention.

It was just a brief glance but somehow, the cursive writing and worn out leather seemed to have called to you and without a second thought to it, your hand gently grasped its spine and pulled it out.

"Memories in walls." The title alone sounded like a pending horror novel but reading it aloud brought a sullen tone from you as you found a table to put it down and simply stared at the years adorning the rugged edges and already half faded cover.

Again, Renjun flashes in your mind, and as if working on instinct, you flip the pages open.

The book was written by a young lord fascinated by the structures of basement and manor expansions throughout the years,how a single building could change over the years of time with different people and the abundant stories each structure hold. He wanted to share to others the sentiment of building homes out of already existing ones, but sadly from the looks of it, the book gained very little attention and this was the only series existing from the author.