Cross My Heart

Chapter Ten

CROSS MY HEART: CHAPTER TEN

"Adam, I told you, I can't dance; please don't make me do this."

"What are you talking about?! You're an amazing dancer." Our school was having a dance, for no reason in particular. However, I think it had something to do with exams being just around the corner; this dance gave us all a way to just relax and have fun. I guess the dance committee, or whoever put together this whole shabang, had put a lot of time and effort into planning this dance, because the gym looked beautiful; you could not even tell that earlier that week it had been used for the boys basketball team's sweaty practice. Blue and white streamers hung from the ceiling, along with blue, white, and silver balloons. A huge disco ball hung from the middle of the ceiling, cascading square flashes of light onto the dance floor. I was surprised that they had even gotten a decent deejay; they had gone all out for this thing.

Adam was literally forcing me against my will to dance with him, although for him I'd do anything. So it wasn't a surprise when he wrapped his arms around me and we started slowly swaying back and forth. I rolled my eyes at him, but I actually wasn't that bad. I would never admit this to him, of course, but it felt good to let all the stress just float away. Between studying for exams, and trying to find my long lost mother, not to mention Adam's episodes, I found myself completely overwhelmed. It felt good to just have some fun, and not worry about anything. For the time being.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Roxanne and her posse all standing by the refreshments table. I assumed they thought they looked cool, but they just looked really desperate. Before I knew it, Roxanne was downing her drink and pulling some random guy on the floor to dance with her. I didn't see what happened next because Adam leaned in and kissed me. When we pulled away, I could see that he had done it on purpose, because Roxanne's eyes were searing through my skin. Or attempting to, because all I saw was Adam.

As we slowly rocked back and forth, or bodies leaning on each other, we talked, but about regular things; it felt nice to not think about all the drama in my life. I still had not told him about my issue with my arm. I had been attempting to cover it up with makeup, which did no justice; it just made my arm have a yellowish tint. So for the few months that we had been dating, I wore long sleeves all the time. Adam always asked why, but I just told him I was always cold. Which seems like the most stupid thing to say when you have the world's warmest teddy bear hugging you all the time. But what am I supposed to tell him?I cut myself because I'm ashamed of how I look, and you should be, too. I can't do anything right; ask anyone that goes to our school. I don't know why you're still with me, because if I could, I would have ditched myself a long time ago.

"Devyn?" Adam's voice caught me off guard. I found myself always dosing off in my own thoughts. My sister had always told me that I over think things too much. I'm probably to blame for half the stress in my life. I looked up at Adam, who was studying me. I swear, I could look into his eyes for hours, and never get bored. Just being with him; standing near him, listening to him while he tries to explain my science homework to me. Everything about him makes me swoon.

"I love you." He looked a little surprised; it had been awhile since I had let myself be happy. I didn't wait for a response, but instead nestled my head in the crook of his neck, where it seemed to fit so perfectly.

We had been dancing to a few slow songs, when I had to go pee. I made my way to the washroom; still on cloud nine. When I opened the door, I wasn't surprised to find Roxanne and her buddies smoking by the sink. I despised smoking; it was probably one of the biggest turn offs to me, not to mention it made you smell like crap. A few months earlier, I would have bolted out of the washroom as fast as I could, but that was the old me; this was the new me. I ignored their stares as I went into the furthest stall from them and did my business. I washed my hands, and was drying them under the heater when Roxanne put her arm around my shoulder.