Sharp Edges: Crosshair x Reader [NSFW]

The Tattoo

"I don't know, Mel" you interjected, interrupting your friend from her diatribe. "There's something there..."

"What? Are you just blinded by the fact that he's half decent in bed?" Mel asked, cocking her head to the side in judgmental expectation.

"Maybe," you laughed, feeling a little heat at the thought of him that way, "But... yeah... I don't know..." you muttered, finishing the last sip of your drink and sucking an ice cube into your mouth to chew on.

"Solid defense," she poked, voice gentle now. "Look. I've known you a long time. I've heard the stories behind a lot of these guys. I just want you to be happy, you know? You're so hard on yourself."

"I know," you conceded, giving her a small, appreciative smile. "I just... I wish there were a manual for this stuff." She laughed, lifting her newly-arrived cocktail in cheers to you.

"Don't we all!"

The conversation wandered to other things, as you munched on some small plates of assorted appetizers. You'd met Mel for a little catch-up date in your favorite restaurant -- a spacious atrium filled with plants of all shapes and sizes and a constantly-rotating menu with cuisines and specialties from across the galaxy. It was full of rich and snooty people, which you didn't love so much, but maintained a hobby of talking crap about them in your head as often as you pleased. Mel was equally comfortable in her finances, although she enjoyed them far more than you did, and gave you a hard time about all that you were missing out on.

"So are you actually going to tell me what he did?" she finally said. You knew she was going to ask, and she was one of the few people with whom you'd actually genuinely opened up, but for some reason you wanted to keep this particular aspect of your life private, hidden, your own little secret. You knew you weren't getting off the hook though, so you'd have to reflect on your hoarding tendencies later.

"I asked him about something he said when he was having a nightmare, and he threw me out right then and there, then didn't talk to me for ten days. Then he shows up with this ugly-ass plant and expects it to all be back to normal."

"A plant? Nevermind... Why are you asking people you barely know about their nightmares?"

"I have no idea. I was curious. I didn't think it'd be a big deal."

"No, people love talking about the terrors that haunt them in their sleep, you're right..."

"Fair enough," you laughed. "But he just switched, right then and there. Froze me out."

"Hmm. Kinda like when you didn't talk to me for a week after I asked about your ex?" Mel arched an eyebrow, swirling her drink with a smug smile.

"Damn, you don't forget anything, do you?" you smirked, but she was right. You did have a habit of walling off to people if there was any hint of invasion or abandonment. Can't feel hurt when you don't care, right?

"Now that I think about it," she continued, more serious now, "Maybe it's worth trying again. You always try to go for people who are so different than you. I get the whole yin and yang thing, but you're so foreign to them that they don't ever really "get" you. They take your whole surface facade at face value and don't know how to deal with it. So someone with the same dysfunctional weird stuff as you might be better cause he'll do the same thing, but at least you both understand the game? I don't know. I don't know how I got through to you, even. But I'm glad I did. If he's half as cool as you are, under the surface, I think you could have something great."

You stiffened, triggered by her accusation of "dysfunctional weird stuff", but slowly melted into a genuine smile. You knew each other well enough to not have to mince your words. You hated letting people in, but you loved the feeling of being known by the close few who were already in. They were the ones who had seen you for who you really were, the good, the bad, and the ugly, and had stayed. There was grace for your faults and celebration of your strengths. They'd just had to drill through a few yards of solid ice to get there.