A vent written from the perspective of my OOC, Lucas Darrling.
Tw: Death, blood, religious talk/psychosis , self blaming and self depreciation.
Oh why did i ever leave my room on that dreadful night? I just had to stick my nose where it didn't belong. Father's right, i never know when to stop, and now she's dead because of me. I watched the life drain from her eyes, the blood drip from her nose. If I had just stayed in my place for ONCE IN MY LIFE, she would be alive. But no, i always screw everything up. With mother and father, my sister, with my friends, with Nat...
I'm a idiot to think i could rule a country when i couldn't even protect my OWN MOTHER. And now I've pushed away the only person who'd even look me in the eye. I always do this. As father once told me, I have to the thouch of satan himself. Everything and everyone i love seems to wither in my grasp, abandoning ship or dying.
IM A IDIOT, IM A IDIOT, IM A IDIOT. I always let the anger in my cruel heart control me, and now look at me, alone. Alone in this room that feels more like a cage with no exit.
Oh how i repent father, forgive me for i have sinned. I am impure, a parasite, corrupted. Oh lord have mercy on the angle you sent me, for i have tainted her heart. May she find peace in never loving me, for i am wrong and unjust. I am disgusting and repulsive, undeserving of her or forgiveness.
I used to hope that one day i'd join my mother in the heavens, but now, i know that will never happen.
I am a Monster, on the outside and the inside.
YOU ARE READING
A Monster's Diary.
RandomIt's a venting book since I'm too prideful to actually talk to people. Just ignore, im doing fine 😁👍 If you do read, there will be tws on chapters when they are needed. These will be written as diary entries.
