We'll Meet Again...I Know When || Bucky Barnes x Reader

39 || Two Faced

...This is odd. You feel like it should be cold right now. You remember being cold, although you don't exactly feel warm either. You just feel...nothing. Not the scarf that's practically strangling your neck or the heavy coat that's several sizes too big. Not the wind that blows harshly against your cheeks or the snowflake that gently drifts into your palm.

"HOLIDAY!" You almost turn - not to answer, but to meet the name with a question. Your mouth opens just in time for someone's hand to grab your shoulder, roughly spinning you around to face them. It takes you a second before recognition finally sparks in your mind. Those eyes - That face -

"Howard, it's snowing!"

"I can see that!" Your brother huffs in annoyance, grabbing both of your hands which have already begun to turn red and icy, "Ma told you not to leave the apartment without mittens, you knucklehead! You're gonna get sick again!"

You barely pay any mind to the scolding - and you barely stay still either, even as he helps slip a pair of knitted mittens on you. You're practically vibrating with excitement and hardly any show of patience (not that much can be expected from a child of your age).

"Hold my hand," Howard commands, however he doesn't actually wait for you to comply, already taking your hand for himself in a tight grip that promises safety.

Despite his supposed annoyance, he always takes his job as your escort very seriously, ensuring no harm comes upon his precious baby sister. You think the world of him for that, never doubting that you're the luckiest five-year-old around to have a big brother like him.

Together, you walk hand-in-hand, although Howard might as well be dragging you along the way, because you're far too busy staring up at the sky, watching in amazement as the white flakes drift down from the clouds overhead. Their dance is peaceful. You feel peaceful.

...It may seem like an insignificant thing to dream about, but walking to school with Howard is actually the earliest memory you can recall in great detail about your past. Unfortunately, much of Hollie's youth is lost to you, faded into a sea of distant nostalgia. You assume it's the same for most people who try to remember their childhoods so late in life. 

You remember being five, living on the east side of New York after having moved to the city for 'better opportunities'. Your father sold fruit, your mother sewed. You can't say too much else about them. They weren't around much. Usually busting their asses, they worked hard to keep their small family afloat during the Depression, all at the cost of being largely absent in their children's lives - something that felt unfair to hold against them later in life, yet a side of you always regrettably had.

You remember Howard better. He was a good brother (despite being an idiot sometimes). He looked out for you more than ma or pa did, anyway, at least beyond shallow favoritism. It probably wasn't easy for him. He was the eldest son, you were the precious baby. Probably didn't help that you were said to have been a fairly sick child, but maybe that's why he was so protective of you. For the longest time, you were all each other had in the world. You'd fight and bicker, driving each other mad as siblings often do, yet you were inseparable throughout it all.

Your memories of become less fuzzy with age. School was a breeze, although your reputation varied. You were smart and quick of tongue, something people either admired or condemned. Of course, even those who hated you had little effect on your ego. That seemed untouchable. Whether a simple act or truly felt, you had almost a dangerous level of confidence that boarded the line of pure arrogance...and it wasn't exactly misplaced.

You got accepted into prestigious universities, first graduating with a PhD in engineering then going back for one in physics just because it sounded interesting. Even if ignoring your impressive intelligence, you still won the genetic lottery with your looks. There were offers and proposals - both for careers and marriage - yet you turned them all down in favor of becoming cofounder of Stark Industries alongside Howard.