Fight to the finish..

34

It has now been a month since me and Leah had that conversation. I'd love to brag about how good everything is between us but in truth I think this relationship is very different to the dynamic we both anticipated. In truth, we are both very jealous people and especially in our career path, a reporter with a camera and editing app are deadly. We have argued multiple times about silly things, but it is starting to become draining.

*flashback*

L: I saw you with her Bella, it's in a photo man. How can you deny that?

B: It never happened Leah I wasn't there. I told you I was out with Ella and Alessia. Literally ask them

Leah has been going mental for the past hour about a clearly edited photo that made the headlines.

"Does England Captain Leah Williamson know the truth about girlfriend, Bella Thorpe's private life?"

I don't know how the media can cause so much drama and not have any conscience. They ruin relationships, lives and careers. The only way she will believe me is if she asks the girls.

*another flashback*

B: Why when I came out of that toilet did I see you walking that girl out of the club to her taxi? She's been gawping at you all night and yet you felt the need to feed into that by speaking to her.

L: Bella she was falling all over the place, I would want someone to help you if you were in that state. You're my girlfriend and you need to trust me.

B: I don't need to do anything. You know I trust no one.

L: Yes and you've never told me why. Why won't you speak about her Bella?

B: Because I don't want to Leah.

*end of flashbacks*

She keeps asking and asking about my ex, Alex, but I can't bring myself to explain the story. The thing about me I like to have control and if I don't I do stupid things to regain that control. Speaking about Alex, that makes me feel weak and vulnerable and not to mention upset because of her actual actions. I just can't talk about it emotionless. I wish I could but I promised Leah I wouldn't use my god complex anymore.

Today is the last game of the season and we'll be heading off to the World Cup soon so we need to make a statement to ensure that we get that spot.  Me and Leah were fairly on time to the stadium considering that we're usually who everyone has to wait for. Today was different, I woke up this morning with a bad gut feeling.

Myself and Leah normally travel to a game in high spirits but today wasn't that at all, we barely spoke. She didn't look at me and it's as if she also had that gut feeling.

We got out onto the pitch and nobody else was out there yet so I took this as my opportunity to speak to Leah and make sure we are okay.

B: Le, are you okay?

L: I'm fine babe just got a weird feeling you know

B: I knew it, I have it too. Like a gut feeling that somethings not right or won't be right today

L: Yeah that, I was worried I thought you was speaking to me to tell me that you don't want to be with me

B: Why would I say that to you Le? You know I want you

L: I know I just ... actually just leave it. I'm overthinking, I'm sorry

B: Don't stress about it. Remember I love you

L: I love you more

We seem okay, which I'm glad about. If me and Leah argue before a match or mid game we crumble on the field, and everyone can tell. Jonas has spoke to us multiple times in the past few weeks about our attitudes towards each other and how it affects the team. But we are trying.

Training and our first half team talk flew by. And before I knew it we were lined up next to the Aston Villa squad ready to finish the season off in style.

The first half was slow and sloppy from both sides, it was hot out here and the intensity of the game was making everyone even more heated. We went in at the break with no shots between either team, 50/50 possession and nothing to show for the torturous heat we just played through.

Back out for the second half and Rachel Daly piled home a goal within the first 2 minutes of the new half. Hearing the roar of the fans made all of us feel so deflated. We knew we needed to push. Not for the table, we have already secured third, but for ourselves.

The final whistle came and we just couldn't create enough. 1-0 loss. The most hurtful result. Shows the mostly even possession but they just had that one extra ounce of creativity and that's why Daly is an amazing striker.