Mama

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I stayed at the graveyard for as long as possible but eventually the coldness of the winter night started becoming unbearable and with my paranoia about getting frostbite again I decided to head home

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I stayed at the graveyard for as long as possible but eventually the coldness of the winter night started becoming unbearable and with my paranoia about getting frostbite again I decided to head home.

Home. If I can even call it that anymore.

Mum may literally kill me if I wake her up at one in the morning so I've decided that I'm just going to sneak into my window like the old days and then explain everything to her in the morning.

I approach my house after an hour of walking and to my surprise all the lights are on and I can hear the faint sound of music.

I knock on the door wearily, unsure of what I'm walking into and it almost immediately swings open. 

"Harper?" My mum says with a huge smile plastered on her face, a glass of wine in hand. "What an unexpected surprise! Come in dear," She ushers me in. You can tell my mother is irreparably drunk when she's actually being friendly.

"Hey Harps!" Someone calls from the living room. I look and see that it's my uncle Tommy on my dad's side.

My dad died eight months after we were born so Uncle Tommy was the closet thing we had to a father figure.

"Hey," I greet him excitedly, genuinely happy to see him. I give him a once over, noticing that he has red lipstick marks all over his neck and his fly is down.

Jesus I wonder how long this has been going on for.

"So what brings you here Harper," My mum smiles at me, her face tainted with smudged lipstick.

"Ah you know, just wanted to see her," I explain. "You couldn't have waited till April?" She asks, knowing I was supposed to come down here to visit then.

"I wanted to spend our birthday together," I say, picking at my nails. "Oh shit! that's right," She exclaims. "Well happy birthday," She laughs even though my birthday has already ended.

"Thanks," I say, sending her a tight lipped smile. "I actually wanted to ask you if you could possibly buy me a ticket back to Cartmel," I ask.

"Of course we can-" Uncle Tommy replies but is cut off by mum. "No," She states, shaking her head.

"Coming down here was impulsive and stupid, if you didn't have enough money to travel both ways then she shouldn't have come," She scolds. "I know but-" I try to defend myself but I'm interrupted.

"No if's no but's!" She tuts. "I mean really Harper, coming here and asking me for money when we're in a cost of living crisis is absurd," She exclaims, wailing her arms about.

"Really?" I question, motioning around to the three story modern house filled with expensive art right in the middle of a gated community. "It's not like you're struggling for money, the ticket is only twenty quid." I try to reason.

As the annoyed look on her face morphs into one of utter hatred I start to remember what was so scary about my mum getting drunk, her mood swings.

"You think I worked this hard just to give all my money to you!" She seethes, grabbing me by the collar of my hoodie and pulling me so close to her face that I can smell the alcohol on her breath.

"No it's just-" I rush out.

"It's just what? You think you can come up into my home and demand to take everything I own," She rants, blowing the situation way out of proportion. "Do you want my tv too? or my wine!" She shouts, chucking her drink all over me and her white sofa.

I immediately stand up, Lucian's hoodie now drenched. "Why can't you just act like a normal mother instead of a raging bitch!" I finally snap, all the times Lucian has called her that giving me inspiration.

Before I even realise what is about to happen her hand, clutching a wine glass swings into the air and slams into my head. The glass shatters everywhere, some falling to the floor while some litter my hair.

I stumble, clutching my bleeding head as I push into the hallway.

"That's right run away you ungrateful brat!" She screams from afar as I enter her study just opposite the front door.

I lock the door before reaching over the wooden desk to the old landline that rests near the computer.

I dial before placing it to my ear, calling the one person who will be able to calm me down just by hearing their voice.

"Lucian?"





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