Bittersweet | ✔️

Forty-Two

I haven't seen Jared at school in a few days, but in all honesty, I haven't exactly been seeking him out, and I hadn't really noticed that I hadn't seen him. I've had a lot on my mind lately. Today, though, people are starting to talk. No one has seen him in many days. Conditions like this make rumors easy to create and spread. People are beginning to whisper that something happened to him. Please. I just assume he's sick or something. I try to avoid the rumors, and I don't pass them on. He wouldn't like it if he knew what kind of theories people are coming up with.

I am more focused on Zane right now. He didn't call me yesterday like he said he would, and I didn't want to be the one to call him, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt. I was pretty let down to not hear from him, but I masked by keeping my mind on other things.

He meets me by the door of my last class.

"Hi," he says softly, with his hazel eyes wide.

"Hi," I say. It feels like a long time since I've seen him, even though it's only been a few days. I just feel so refreshed when I see him. I forget why it's been so long since we last talked. Time passes slower for me than for others.

We stroll to the parking lot together without saying anything else. I want to hold his hand, but his are both in his pockets, so we just walk next to each other. There's enough noise coming from all the cars trying to leave at once. Everyone's so anxious to be somewhere else. I'm happy right where I am.

"I'm sorry I didn't call you yesterday," he says when he reaches my car. "I just got really busy doing stuff for my mom."

"Hey, it's no big," I say with a shrug. It's not like I sat near the phone the whole night. I was too busy not relaxing after my bath and worrying about everything I could think of. Once you start worrying about one thing the others just naturally follow. I worried about what Zane and Dusk might do, what Muse and Crow might do. And I did wait for a little while by the phone, but he doesn't need to know that.

"I do have some good news though."

"Oh?"

"I'm going to be staying in town a little longer than I thought," he says. My eyes light up, and he notices, so he quickly adds, "but I am leaving eventually. Just maybe not as soon as I thought before."

Still, a little more time is better than nothing. "Why do you have to leave at all?" I find myself asking, even though I already know the answer.

"I'd stay if I could," he says.

There's a moment of silence. He looks into my eyes. I feel like we're the only ones in the whole world, even in the middle of a crowded parking lot. "So why are you staying longer?" I ask.

"I...just a change in plans." He forces a smile, and the hesitation makes me think that he's just not sharing something with me. Typical. Well, I guess it's not important right now. He does like to keep his secrets, and I like to keep mine. The important thing is that he's going to be here a little longer.

"I'll see you later," he says.

"You don't want to do something?" I ask, trying to sound nonchalant, but I do want to do something. I want to spend every minute I can with him before he goes. Because when he does, I truly will be alone.

"I can't..." he says vaguely. I don't say anything. "I have plans with Ivana."

"Which one of us are you dating?" I retort.

"Ha-ha," he says. "I'll see you soon. I'll call you."

I don't know what to say, so I don't say anything. I wish I didn't feel so desperately clingy, but I do. He heads towards his car. There's nothing I can do. I'm disappointed because I wanted to do something with him, but that doesn't look like it's going to be much of an option.