Expressing sentiments

20

June 2023

what does it mean to be blessed? 06/03/23 

It's pure bliss if you both enjoy staying at home and going out.
Wherever you are, your thoughts won't be loud.
It's a different kind of pleasure when you can be happy alone.
I don't feel lonely; wherever I am is home.
Calm trees and the strong waves of the ocean.
I just continuously appreciate God's creation.
Living life with a content heart.
With a thoughtful mind and an unbothered heart, everything you do is an art.
I'm not just blessed for a second, minutes, or hours—not even a few days.
Pressured by society, but everything is not going my way.
I'm grateful to see things as more than just shades of gray.




Is it clean? 06/04/23

Your side looks clean, but who really knows?
Is it still considered clean if you intentionally hurt people around you?
Not your loved one, not one of your friends, but someone who you believed was an extra to your made-up story.
You wish karma on your enemies, but I honestly wish karma on you.
We weren't lovers or friends before, but you mocked my existence just so you wouldn't feel inferior.
Was it fun? Or did you change and blame it on the idea that you were young?
Sweet 16, wasn't it?
Not so sweet because I was your ace to fit.
I do forgive people, but I would never forget.
You don't have the right to embarrass someone just because she isn't one of your favorites.
You probably can't remember how you messed up my mind.
Honestly, because of you, confidence is hard to find.
Are you thrilled? I'm socially anxious because of you.
What an achievement! I'm rooting for you to grow.

time isn't mine 06/01/23

I'm unbelievably happy and sad at the same time.
I am happy with everything I know, with things I can do, and with things I have.
But I'm sad with everything I don't know, with things I can't do, and with things I can't have.
There are things that I want that I can't call mine.
There are things that were once mine but were pulled away by time.
And there are times that I don't know what's really mine.




How it was 06/05/23

I calculated my actions for the sake of keeping you.
Pretend I'm not hurt because I know you'll blame yourself if you know.
I expressed my feelings so you'd feel loved.
You were perfect and unbothered.
I was anxious and insecure because I thought you were above me.
But you did stare at me lovingly.
I never received reassuring words from you.
Sweet nothings, literally nothing, caught you counting, and I was all blue.
You loved me, but not unconditionally.
I loved you so much that I let you step on my boundaries.




forget love 06/04/23

People wish to find love, which is why when they meet someone, they become hopeful.
I've been praying for peace, and that's why, to everyone who once hurt me, I'm a bit thankful.
I was happy and delusional; it was kind of worth it.
Love was once my strength; things are different now. Forget it.
Romanticize life too much; every person who loved me left insecure.
High maintenance, risk-taking, and too secured.
I can't love people who can't own up to their faults.
Good at goodbyes; tired from repeated revolts.
Being a hopeless romantic never gets me anywhere.
Now all I want is not to care.




Frances 06/07/23

Is it acceptable if you start to like an artist because it reminds you of someone?
I don't even know where to start; I'm not one of their fans.
Unconsciously, I fell in love with everything she loved.
It doesn't feel like on my comfort zone, I was forcefully grabbed.
She wasn't one of a kind, but she kept me up at night.
It was peaceful with her; I don't want to sleep, not because we're in a fight.
Her busy schedule didn't stop me from falling.
She didn't know it, but for her, I was all in.
It wasn't my first love, and it wouldn't be my last.
I appreciate Frances, and I'm grateful that I once had her in my past.