𝗚𝗟𝗨𝗘 𝗦𝗢𝗡𝗚 ᵉˡˡᶤᵉ ˣ ᶠᵉᵐ ʳᵉᵃᵈᵉʳ

⌠15⌡

august 15th

you make your way to your room, lost in thought about ellie's confession from the day before. with a sigh, you shut the door behind you and begin the tedious process of extracting yourself from your clothes, ready to climb under the cool sheets.

you lie down on the bed like a starship with your phone in your hand.

as you toss and turn, trying to find a comfortable position, you can't help but wonder what ellie was thinking when she was sharing those feelings to you. did she really mean it? or was it just some sort of impulsive moment brought on by the heat of the day and the closeness of your bodies? you can't help but feel a strange mixture of anticipation and anxiety.

since yesterday, you have been searching for words. there is no evolution since then. ellie and you exchanged less than ten words, and not a single smile. and last night was awkward when you both tried to sleep.

ellie is nowhere to be seen today. and apparently, she left with the boys to go to the store, at least, that is what dina said.

you squeeze your phone as you look at the ceiling. you feel like it is time to say something, even if it is just to apologize for not saying anything at the time. apologizing seems better than nothing.

you search for her name, which is actually the very first one since you haven't text anybody else for days. you tap on every letters, then you delete. you tap and delete, again and again. you may have written ten different messages, but you delete them as soon as you have finished every sentence.

(hi. sorry i haven't said anything since yesterday. i've thought a lot about what you said. it surprised me. i never thought you would think of me that way.)

(hey! i wanted to talk about yesterday, if that's ok?)

(hey ellie.)

(hey, i'm sorry if you think i'm avoiding you, i honestly don't. i was just thinking a lot, and i truly didn't know what to say, or to think. i'm really confused. i never thought you would think of me that way. but to be honest, i feel the same way. it is just as you said. you feel me everywhere, and i see you everywhere. i see you in your empty bed and in the glass you left on the kitchen table this morning. i see you in the guitar you played yesterday. and i even see you when i close my eyes. i don't avoid you, at all. and i feel like you are the one avoiding me since the beach. i don't know.)

(hi, when will you guys come back?)

(hey ellie, is everything ok between us?)

delete. delete. delete. it seems that the perfect words don't want to come to your mind. you are deleting the last message, watching every letter disappear one after one.

you slide your finger across the screen and accidentally touch the word 'send'. your eyes open wide and you sit up on the bed.

TO ELLIE:
he

ellie looks at her phone with a frown. for the last ten minutes, she has been watching the three little dots appear and disappear as you were writing. ellie has spent the day thinking about you. she read the few messages you exchanged and she looked at pictures she took for the past two weeks.

pictures you are on.

she was expecting a long message, looking forward to read it. but all she sees is one word, two letters.

FROM ELLIE:
?

she answers immediately.

there are a few kilometers separating you at this moment, though they are becoming fewer and fewer as ellie and the boys make their way to the house. you are both head down with your phones in your hands, waiting for an answer from the other.