The Red Queen | Lucien Castle & Tristan de Martel

Chapter 24

She returned to a silent Compound.

There were no conversations, only a shower running in Elijah's room. She spoke quietly to Klaus and Kol, letting them know her work was done. She'd left Esther with a blood bag, giving her a choice they never received. Kol had assured her that now that she was in transition, Esther would not be able to body jump even if she didn't feed. No matter the outcome, they were safe. All that was left was to find Mikael. As soon as they were rid of him, Hayley could come home.

"You look upset," she murmured, noticing Klaus had a faraway look in his eyes. "What are you thinking about?"

He hesitated. "I spent the day with my father. My real father."

"He was out in the Bayou?"

"He helped me find the merlock orchid. Esther truly believed he could convince me to renounce vampirism. I suppose... I considered it. The thought of what I could be, had I been raised by him. Had I been nurtured. I think I might've known what a good father is like, I'd feel more prepared to teach my daughter. I think I'd have been more open to knowing the other side of myself."

"There is a chance," whispered Vivalda. "He wasn't being mind-controlled, was he? If he's not under Esther's influence, maybe you could know him?"

"I don't want to. It won't be safe."

"For who, Nik? For you? For Hayley? For the baby?"

"If he were to cause me to let my guard down..."

"Are you strong enough to kill him if you need to?"

"I would kill anyone who threatened their lives."

"Then you have nothing to worry about. With your permission, I can take that burden from you, should it become necessary. I think if there is an opportunity... you should at least entertain it. I think you are ready to become a good father. But there will be ups and downs. Some of those may be eliminated if you first learn to be a son who was loved, so you may empathize with your daughter as she grows up, so loved by you. You have been more open to knowing the wolves, but perhaps that curiosity may soar to new heights if you speak to Ansel about what he knows. It's okay, Nik. We support you. We love you."

She took his hand. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I couldn't kill Mikael."

"Don't be foolish," he muttered. "I ought to have done it myself. You dueled him when I fell. You took the white oak stake back for us. That kill is mine, I would have hated you if you did."

"Yet you hate me because I didn't."

"I don't hate you, sister. I hate Mikael. I hate that you were his golden child, that each time I did something wrong, you arrived and did it right." He laughed bitterly, "And you never realized it, either, you never knew because even your best wasn't good enough to you. Vivalda Mikaelson, the Destroyer's Daughter, needed to reach new heights to impress her father or it wouldn't be sufficient, it wouldn't mean anything. Yet all the while you were competing against yourself, I fell further and further behind. He made me realize it. I loathed you for it, but in reality I loathe him. For the way he treated me. The way the idiot could not even tell you he was proud of you even though he so clearly was. I... I once heard him say–"

"I know," she cut in gently. "Esther told me. I don't blame you for not saying anything. But I do blame myself for this. No matter what he means to me, it should matter more that I protect our family, that I protect you and your daughter. We have not always seen eye to eye and more often than not we bicker. But when Antonella called me... she was worrying her head off about me going to face Mikael. I told her you were with me and that I was safe. You do make me feel safe, Nik. During storms you comforted Rebekah and as soon as she was quiet, you came to me and though I pretended not to be afraid, you would caress my hair like Mother used to until I stopped trembling. You never told anyone, you didn't make me feel insecure."