Love's Thorned Path. - Seongjoong smut.

Healing With Whiskey

Seonghwas POV
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Right when the last lesson ended, Hongjoong came back rushing to class.
He went to his table with a frustrated face and sat down. He packed his things and went back out.

I slowly started packing my things and finally looked at the gifts I got from Hongjoong. There were flowers, and a lot of chocolate.

San looked in the bag too.
"He got you roses?"
He widened his eyes.

"Shh."
I covered his mouth.

"Your sister might hear."
I whispered.

He slapped away my hand.
"Who cares?"

We stayed quiet and then went back to our lockers to get Sans gift and our jackets.
We got those things and we went outside.

I looked inside Sans gift again.
"Wanna drink with me?"

San turned to me with a smile.
"I'd love to, but I have volleyball today."

"Awh..."
I looked down.

After I arrived home I took a glass from our dish drawer, I went to my room and almost immediately I poured the whiskey in the glass and just took it like a shot.
It felt great. It felt relieving. It was healing. I poured another one and took another like a shot. It wasn't legal for me to drink but how else could I cope? It wasn't so easy after all. I put the glass down and just started drinking from the bottle itself. I put it back down and I hopped on the windowsill. My hands were already shaking.

I took another sip of the whiskey and then put the bottle next to me, on the windowsill. I looked outside and just hoped that I would be able to get at least the smallest amount of affection from Hongjoong. I bit my lip and put my hand on the bottle again, my mind was already getting messed up by the alcohol.
I looked at it, half of it was already gone. I still wanted more of it. I put it to my lips and drank more, there wasn't anyone to help, care or stop me. With one shot I finished the whole bottle. I put it on my table and went downstairs to take another one. My parents weren't home, it was just me. I opened the alcohol drawer and took out another two and went back to my room. I opened one and started off with just a glass of it, but as soon as I got a taste of it, I was chugging it again.

I put it down and wiped my lips that were covered in the magical juice I was holding. I guess this was just the way I was gonna celebrate. Why go to therapy when you can just drink?
I started hearing someone coming up the stairs. I hid the unopened bottle, but I couldn't care less for the mildly done one and the finished one. Someone opened the door, I squinted my eyes but still couldn't tell.

"Who is this?"
I mumbled.

"Your mom."

"Ah, hi."
I hopped back on the windowsill.

She came closer to me and checked out what I was drinking.
"Why? Why are you drinking?"

I smiled like it was a good thing.
"So you wouldn't have to pay for therapy."
I started laughing.

She looked at me.
"You'd have to pay for yourself from today."

"Oh wait, right."
I started laughing even more.

"Seonghwa, honey, what happened?"
She sat down on the table as I took the halfway done bottle.

I started chugging the bottle again and gave her no answer until I finished it.

I took a deep breath and smiled again while tears were slowly starting to roll down my cheeks.
"I don't want to share, but I don't want to keep it in."
I looked up at my mom.

I cleared my throat and started to share my worries.
"Cupid targeted me, and I don't want to be a target of lovey dovey suicide. I just want to live a life of not being in love. Even better, he has a girlfriend."

"Honey, you're gay?"
My mom widened her eyes at me.

"I didn't think so, and I still don't know."
I completely broke down in tears.
"But I know that I want him bad but I won't get anything like him."

"What's his name?"

"Hongjoong."

"Can you someday bring him in for a card reading?"

My mom was always really interested it tarot cards, but I always thought they were meaningless and useless, I never wanted them tried on me and I never wanted them on my friends.

"Mom, I love you so much but I don't believe them, and I doubt he does."
I started sobbing harder.

My mom stood up, kissed my forehead and then hugged me. I hugged her too and then we stayed like that for a minute.

"You'll get over it baby. It will hurt, but you'll get over it."

She pulled away and held my hands.
"If you need any help, ask me or dad, we're always here to help you."

"I am so lucky to have you."
I had a river down my cheeks just flowing.

She wiped off my tears, kissed my forehead again and left. I felt even worse now for drinking, I made my mom stress over me so badly. I felt like a horrible person.