Letters of Sorrow | Soukoku angst

Letter #3

It's me, Chibi again. (God... I hate that name, but you liked it, didn't you?) 

I went back to the rooftop, your favorite spot. (It was probably your favorite spot because you wanted to jump, but I'll try to ignore that.) I wasn't the only one there. The were-tiger was also there. He was napping or something. I let him be. He must've been really tired because he didn't even hear my footsteps.

You kept telling me to stop smoking because it was bad for me, but you did it yourself too.

I smoked again for the first time in a while today. It wasn't that bad. It's not the same as drinking, but I'll settle for smoking.

I got in trouble for drinking on the job.

I don't want to explain it right now, maybe later, but not right now.

I would ask how you're doing up there but we both knew that you weren't going to end up there. I'll ask, how is it down there?

You can't answer me.

You don't even believe in that stuff.

[Chuuya's eyes water, tears build up in his eyes. He can't write any more than that. He drops his pen. He tries to pull his hair to ground himself, he can not breakdown now. Despite his efforts to keep the tears from streaming, they begin to roll down his face and onto his paper, smudging his beautiful handwriting. He barely manages to end the letter before he completely loses it.]

You're dead.

You left.

I really hate you...