It's okay until it isn't

Goodbye

Minho's POV:

When I stepped into our house, the others were talking and sharing ideas.

I looked at the corner and saw Newt.

Holding a gun.

If I was crying before, I only cried harder.

The others voices became muffled, and soon stopped when they saw Newt.

I heard them back out of the room, they knew Newt needed to be alone with me.

I stared blankly at Newt.

"Newt?"

Newt looked up.

His eyes looked dark and void of light.

He had dark circles under his eyes.

His hair was ruffled every which way.

His mouth was a straight line, starting to twitch downard.

"I-I want to die. Haha."

One second I was standing by the door, the next I was next to Newt, hugging him. I involuntarily stood up, and Newt did too, clutching one of the walls for support. I didn't realize I had been holding my breath until I let it out. I rubbed at my eyes with the palm of my hand, never taking my eyes off Newt.

"I-Isn't t-there another w-way?"

Newt shook his head sadly. I knew I was stuttering over almost all my words, but I couldn't care less.

"W-We could g-get you h-help. . . I c-could d-do something."

Newt looked dead already

"Th-There's nothing you can do th-this time."

I was shaking now.

"P-Please Newt! We- I can make it okay!"

Newt had tears running down his face.

"N-No we c-can't, Min. Not everything is okay. Y-You can't f-fix everything. . ."

I smiled through the tears

"I can t-try."

Newt gave me an exhausted smile.

"B-But i-it won't work. I'll just h-hurt us b-both more."

I took in a shuddering breath

"Please baby. . ."

Newt looked up into my eyes.

"Minho, I-I'm so s-sorry, b-but I can't. I-I'm just s-so tired. I k-keep thinking o-of the others. I-I just c-can't."

Newt was still holding the gun, and he put the other hand over his eyes, as he faced the ground, his body shaking.

I looked at my lover.

My best friend.

My life.

My world.

My everything.

I summoned all the strength in my destroyed body.

I reached for Newt's hand.

I carefully took the gun from it.

Newt looked up at me.

He knew what I was doing.

I could see it in his eyes.

I knew what I was doing.

Sob after sob racked my body.