Delilah

Chapter 13

For once, I'm really out of words. Out of anyone, it had to be because of him. Fuck! He actually asked me on a date!! A date! Me! Out of all the girls in here, he asked me! What the Fuck. I said no of course! How could I go on a date, I can't do relationships, they'd run for the hills if they were with me for one fricking day!!

"Earth to Delilah" Abbie says tapping me on the shoulder, pulling me out of my thoughts.

"What?" I sigh grabbing a cloff to wipe the spilt alcohol by the cordials.

"You were zoned out. What did he say to you??" She says snatching the cloff out of my hand to get my attention.

"He asked me to go on a date." This girl knows I hate confrontation yet here she is in my face confronting me.

"WHAT??" She says clasping her mouth shut realising how loud she spoke.

"Ssshh! God I can't tell you anything!!" I smack her arm to show my irritation.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry but what?? Well what did you say? " Gasp.
"Did you say yes??? Oh my god your going on a date with him! Your gonna get kidnapped! Your gonna get murdered and it'll be my fault!! My best friend is going on a date with a lunatic!!! Oh my god no you can't you cant" she babbles on pacing up and down stating things that could happen. I can't remember the last time she freaked out like this.

I grab her by her shoulders and turn her to face me
directly.

"Abbie, breathe. I said no. I said I don't like him and do not want to go on a date. Now chill out before you give yourself a heart attack" I study her as she sighs in relief and let's her body relax.
And I thought I was crazy.

We spent the rest of our shift going on about it. Well Abbey did shall I say, I just hummed and nodded in response to her outrageous thoughts about it. You can tell she watches too much murder documentaries. Every time I spend the night at hers, it's all she ever watches. It creeps me out. How could she like that shit. The groosumness and the way these men and women have murdered people is disgusting. I can't bear a drop of blood never mind hearing how somebody killed someone. I wouldn't even be surprised if Abbie told me she's killed someone, I'd be more shocked if she said she was in love with a guy then murdered someone. She's really just one of a kind you know. But she's every thing too me. She's been there for me ever since I stepped foot into this club. From day one we've been Inseparable. She's the reason I have this bit of confidence, she's the reason I get reassurance. I don't get shit from anyone in here because of her. She's always been there for me, it's why my mom loved her so much, she saw it before I did, she said she'd stick around and she has, she's not left my side once and I couldn't be more grateful.

Our shift went a lot quicker with all this talking. We're now walking to my car, and it's only 2:30am, we got to finish earlier because we begged two of the girls to cover for us so we can go to McDonald's. Theyve never liked us but it's mutual because we dislike them more. We have a reason to dislike them, they just dislike us down to jealousy and how different Hector treats us to them. We had to pay them 20 each. It's not really much to lose considering the amount we got today anyway. They need it more then us.

We get into the car and sigh in sync. It happens a lot, we just feel the same shit every time we finish. The same negativity vibes. I like it in a way because we understand each other without having to explain what's bothering us. We're both grieving. She lost her brother two years ago in a car accident, she's never been the same, and now that I'm going through it with my mom, I understand how she feels. She said it's different, she said I feel more pain because I lost a mom but in my opinion its the same. We both got our hearts ripped out by losing them. We lost ourselves. We lost someone we would die for, no one could understand the pain unless you've been through it. Her brother was the nicest boy I've ever met, he used to take us on stupid drives at night when he finished work. He'd come and check to see if we were awake and then ask if we were bored, we always said yes because we know it'd resort into a late night drive. It's not the same anymore, we go on night drives but it'll never feel the same, he used to make us laugh until we couldn't breathe, he'd sing all our girly songs with us but wouldn't dare tell anyone, he wouldn't even let us tell anyone which made it funnier. My mom did the same for us, we'd go to McDonald's at four in the morning then drive around singing our hearts out to little mix and Rhianna. My mom was the mom Abbie never had, and her brother was the brother that I never had. It's why we've gotten closer then we ever have, we need each other more, we need more support, reassurance, a shoulder to cry on.

We drove around for a few hours, it's now 05:07 and here I am walking up my drive way. Abbie asked me to stay at hers but I told her I need to be at home and sort through some of moms stuff which is true but I don't think I'll be able go do it.

I twist my key into the door and open it. As I walk into the hallway, I notice that all the beer cans are gone, all the broken glass is gone, it's tidy. Not a bottle in sight. I hear movement in the kitchen causing me to jolt. Rick's never up this early.
I slowly make my way to the kitchen, stopping when I get by the door. I peep my head round to see if I can see anything. I couldn't see at first but then I see a figure pacing around the island. I slowly creep inside and turn on the kitchen light holding my keys in my hand in a tight grip incase I need to swing. It works, I saw it in a movie once, the key stabbed the dude in the neck and knocked him straight out.

"Rik?" I say, unsure of what has gotten into him.

"Oh my god Delilah!!" He says sighing and running towards me, arms outstretched. I didn't know what he was gonna do and so I squeezed my eyes shut waiting for whatever is to come. But its a hug. He's squeezing me tight like he doesn't want to let go. I pat his back inniatiating it's too much touchyness and so he realises me and cups my face.

"Are you okay? What happened?" I feel worried and concern for him. I haven't seen him like this.

He's struggling to get his words out but all off a sudden, he's on the floor, crying, clinging to the floor for help. It's breaking me seeing him like this. I know it's hitting him hard too. I just couldn't give him the comfort he needs because he keeps drinking. I get down on my knees and pull him towards me, rubbing his back, squeezing him just as tight as he was squeezing me. I feel tears prickling down my face, it's obvious it's breaking us, but I thought I could be strong around him so he can't use it against me when he's treating me like shit but I can't. I can see the pain through his eyes when he's trying to express fury and anger towards me. I see it because I see it in my own.
We sit on the floor for what felt like hours until he lifts him self up and cups my face once again. He wipes away the remaining tears falling down my cheeks.

"I'm so sorry baby, I promise I won't drink again. I'm so sorry for doing this to you" he runs his thumb down the bruise on my cheek. I can feel the tears stinging the back of my eyes threatening to fall, I don't want to hear this but I know I have to, I cant ignore him in this state.

" I wish I didn't. I know mom wouldn't want me to cope like this but I did it anyway knowing what state it puts me in and I'll never forgive myself. I swear, I -I won't touch it again, I'm going back to work tomorrow and I'm gonna s- sort myself out okay, I promise. W-We're gonna get through this together properly okay. "  That's all it took, hearing him sob through these words set all my emotions off. And now here I am sobbing into his chest, clinging on to him like it's the last thing I'll ever be able to do. He cradles me just like he used to when I'd come home from school when I was upset.
My vision starts to go black and all of a sudden I'm being picked up and carried up the stairs. I can still feel myself crying silently but as soon as he puts me down in my bed, everything turns black.