childhood crush

PART TEN - change

over the time of the 4 months me and my brother have gotten very close. closer then usually. i told him everything about tom and my friendship with the others and rachel. he loved hearing my storys. but i know he hated tom after everything i said. he even come to me and said that he was gay but not to think of him differently. i love my brother and i will always support him. todays the day were going home.

"hey liam are u coming back home with us?" i ask him. "yeah ofc i am? im not letting you go back to germany with that asshole tom" he says. i giggle i loved having his protection. me and liam look completely different. well we looked alike when we were younger but since we both hate our dad he dies his hair blonde so he dosent have to look like him. he got moms blue eyes and i got my dads brown eyes and brown hair. on the flight back to germany liam let me get window seat. the whole plane ride we talked about what we think is gonna happen when he get there.

we finally get to germany and we unpack everything. "your coming with me to bills house!" i tell liam. im gonna be honest im not over tom. i love him still. but i have to act like im over him cause clearly hes over me in the same day we broke up. "alright bet! its been awhile since ive seen bill!" i forgot to mention. liam used to be best friends with bill too. and honestly since i showed liam photos of bill i think he developed a crush. we get to bills house and knock on the door. tom opens it this time. i didnt expect to see him. it kinda hurt me to see him. i felt liam grab my hand and squeeze it because he knew how i felt. i look at the floor. "were looking for bill and the others" liam says. "well im not letting a stanger into my house" tom says with attitude. jeez when did he get like this. i look up at tom. with anger still. "hes not a stanger hes my brother" i say demandingly. "oh shit, liam?" tom says surprised. i pushed tom out the way and walked in. feeling him again sucked.

i missed him so much that i just wanted to jump into his arms. as soon as we walked in we say some half naked blonde girl on the couch. "jesus fucking christ!" i yell covering my eyes. i guess he had a new girlfriend. we go up to bill rooms. i knock in his door. "come in" he says. i open the door. "hiii!" i say. bill jumps out his bed. "madi omg!!" bill as he hugs me. "whos this handsome guy?" bill says looking at him. "oh thats liam my brother remember?" i say. bill looks embarrassed. "oh actually im so sorry i said that" bill says. "oh actually its fine your handsome too" liam says. "ooooo" i say liam elbows me as the look at eachother. "well ill give yall time to catch up" i say and wink. i leave and shut the door. oh shit wait were do i go now. tom is downstairs with a fucking girl. i quickly go down the stairs and go into the basement. "they left it alone again after i left" i walk down there and pick up my guitar. i made some songs when i was in america. i started playing it and singing it.

once i finished i realized liam, bill and tom were all down stairs. ofc i wrote that song about tom but now that hes actually here and listen to it felt different. "did you write that madi?" bill says. i try to ignore that tom was there. "yeah i wrote it about someone" i say. i didnt want to say toms name. "dont fucking worry madi i wrote a song about you too." tom says as he grabs his guitar. shit. he starts playing a song.

tom finishes i sat there speechless. thats the first time i ever heard him sing. "oh but dont fucking worry madi that was when we were dating" he says with attitude. hes really making me upset. "oh i have one too from when we were dating" i start playing the song and singing it.

i started crying a little bit. "happy now?" bill and liam still looked shocked. now tom looks shocked. i think he realized how much he hurt me. "madi look im sorry" i cut him off. "i dont want to fucking here it so go back upstairs and fuck ur little girlfriend. oh! and i hope they dont make a whole stalker page about you guys." i say poking into his chest.

"what fucking happened to you madi" he says getting in my face. "what happened to me? what happened to you? if you want to know what happened i lost the love of my life cause i had to move but he didnt seem to give a fuck" i say. hes eyes get teary. "maybe he did care! maybe he would do anything in the fucking world for you!" he yells. "well really if he really did care he wouldnt be yelling in my face and if he did care and wanted to be with me and actually loved me he would stay long distance!" i screamed that time. everyone came downstairs to watch. even toms girlfriend. "maybe he would actually kill for you?! maybe he would die for you?!" he yells back. not knowing his girlfriend is there.

"if he did he would of stayed with me!" i yell. at this point were both in tears. "maybe he loved you more then he loved himself!" he yells. "and maybe madi he still does fucking love you more than himself!" he screams. "mhm sure tom fucking sure! go say that to your girlfriend!" i yell. "shes not my girlfriend! ive been hooking up with random girls because none of them are like you! none of them cared for me when i was sick! none of them made me food every morning! none of them kissed me goodnight! none of them didnt use me for sex! none of them cared enough about me to realize my needs like you!" he yells. "so what's supposed to mean!" i yell. "god madi it means i fucking love you!" he yells. everyone was so invested. gustav made his girlfriend leave.

"you love me?" i say in a normal voice. he walks closer to me. "yes madi i fucking love you" he says in his normal voice. "no" i say. "what do you mean no?" he says. "fuck you." i say and walk out the basement. he basically just spilt his feelings for me and i acted like i didnt care. tom runs after me. "you just cant say no!" "yes i can tom u said no to me when i brought up long distance"

"damn" all the guys say. "madi dont leave me" he says. "dont leave you?" i laugh. "you left me?! you left me and didnt care to get me back! yk i went through depression because how much i fucking missed you and loved you?" he stays quiet. "you were depressed?" liam bumps in. "speaking of depression here" liam pulls out a pill bottle and pops a pill out to me. i take it and swallow it without a drink.

"your fucking depressed?" tom says. "yeah tom, i am, why does that matter to you" i say. "like ive said i still love you, i still care for you, i still want to be your boyfriend" i walk past tom and go upstairs. i go into bills room. liam and bill go to me and gustav and georg go to tom knowing we are both hurt.

1330 words !