The next day I met up with Aleah for lunch at this little diner on campus in between classes. I had told her about Dace’s freak out.
“What the hell is wrong with them?” she said sipping on her diet coke.
“I don’t know” I responded shaking my head.
“Tay” she paused. “Never mind”
“No, tell me.”I was irritated. I hate when people do that. Say they have something to tell you but never do.
“You don’t think they know something about that night?” she said avoiding eye contact. The room started spinning. And I zoned out for a few seconds. “I mean, I know it’s a little farfetched but if its not jealousy than what else could it be? The only other connection both of them have to you is that night. You even said yourself you remember them being there. And..” her voice trailed off.
“And what?!” I yelled.
“And Dace has blue eyes.” She said softly
“no.” I yelled. “He wouldn’t do that to me!”
“Calm down Taylor. I’m trying to help. It’s just a theory.” She said.
“It’s not a theory because I know it wasn’t him. And if it was why would he be taking me out on dates and actually getting to know me? Huh!?” I snapped at her.
“Taylor” she sternly said to me. “You’re making a scene.” I rolled my eyes. I didn’t give a fuck if I was making a scene. Her accusation of dace being my rapist was so uncalled for and ridiculous.
“I have to go.” I said as I got up and left the building. I ran to the library crying. I climbed up the fire escape. I got to the top and threw my back pack to the ground. I fell to the ground and curled into a ball and continued to cry. I kept telling myself it couldn’t be him. It wasn’t Dace. It’s not possible. But then again, I didn’t think it was possible to lose my virginity to an unknown man who forcefully took it away. I guess a learned a long time ago that nothing is impossible. I started to second guess myself. Aleah’s theory made sense but I don’t understand how he could do that to me. Its not him. Its not him. I was like a broken record. I questioned who I was trying to convince it wasn’t him. I knew it wasn’t him, atleast I wanted it not to be him.
