DNF one-shots :)

What did I do? (Angst)

Tw's and cw's:

• hospital
• death 
• suicide mentions
• signs of depression

Get the tissues ready for this one...

Also first half of this was written a very long time ago, pls keep that in mind when reading the beginning 😭😭 I promise it gets better guys

Also the whole chapter isn't in chronological order so it might get confusing at some points

Also some thoughts are in italics and some normal writing bc wattpad glitches a lot :(

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Dream's POV:

Why, why would he do that? I just don't understand why he would do that. How could he have already moved on? Was I just not good enough for him? Was he just using me the whole time? I love him! I fucking love him! And that's the problem, I love him, he loved me. Or maybe that was all a lie as well, maybe he never even loved me at all! Maybe he was with that asshole Josh the whole fucking time we were together!

I don't understand, why can't I just move on? Why can't I just move on like he did, a fucking day after we broke up! And guess what? He stopped fucking talking to all our friends as well. Not just me, but the friends he had known for years, the friends that had helped him and been through so muchwith, and he chose this bitch called Josh who probably knows nothing about him!

You might be wondering who 'he' is, well he was my boyfriend, clearly not anymore. But before that he also used to be my best friend, the one who always stayed on calls with me when we were oceans apart, the one I would always go to when I needed someone to talk to, one of my favourite people ever, George.

I had been crying about this for weeks now, we had broken up around this time last month. I hadn't left my room since then I don't plan on it anytime soon, I know Sapnap is incredibly worried about me, but I still can't leave. The thought of even seeing George outside is stuck in my head, I don't want it to happen but at the same time I do. I don't want to because I don't want to see the bitch George left me for, I do because I want to punch Josh in the head as hard as I fucking can.

I still remember the conversation we had, the conversation that would change my life, the conversation that would cause me to not leave my room, the conversation that would cause me to be crying 24/7 for the next month, and to be honest it's not even that much of an exaggeration, I really had been crying 24/7 for the past month, almost non-stop. The conversation when George told me that he wanted to break up.

Even the thought of it causes my eyes to be overtaken by the tears, which has become such a familiar feeling over the past month or so. I just wish I could've done something different, something that would change the outcome. But I don't even know what I would do different, what I would have to change. I don't even know what went wrong! And I hate myself for it. I wish I could've just known, known why. I could've prevented this all from happening.

I check my phone again, like I've been doing for he past month, still no texts from George, I sigh. Bringing my head back down to lie on the pillow at the head of my bed, a few seconds later I hear a knock at my door. "Come in" I say. holy shit why do I sound like that? No wonder George left me, my voice sounds fucking terrible. I then see Sapnap entering my room.