Too far gone to know where it started

CHAPTER 1: Stars

We had just arrived back at the colony. Everyone was shoving the others out of the way to get off the bus. There wasn't any room in the walkway. I told N to not even worry about trying to squeeze his way through, and told him to just get off last.

It wasn't long before everyone got off the bus. I started to think about what had happened at camp... I couldn't get it out of my mind. I felt so... horrible. I've turned into a monster... I really don't care about anyone that died but... what if it's someone I actually care about next time?
N ended up pulling me away from my thoughts when he said my name. He questioned if I was okay, I just told him I was fine. Honestly, I really didn't feel like explaining any of my thoughts to him. Plus, it's embarrassing to just talk about my feelings like that.

When I stepped off the bus, my face got a burst of cold, crisp air. It was pretty windy out today. I didn't mind, I'm usually sweaty anyway, so the cold breeze felt good. Maybe it would also help with keeping my system cooled so I don't overheat.

The sun was beginning to rise, but I could barely see it with the amount of snow blowing and the dust blocking most of the suns rays. The sun becomes completely visible around mid day- well usually. Sure, there were places that beamed with light early in the day, but not many spots.

Inhale
...
Exhale

That's it...

I took a deep breath before I actually stepped off the bus. N offered his hand to help me down, but I didn't bother to accompany it. He let out a little frown before speaking. "Uzi... what happened at camp was... probably a traumatic experience, but I can assure you that you'll be okay. I swear." He ended up smiling at the last sentence. I couldn't exactly hold back my smile at his words. They really meant a lot to me, even though I didn't really show it. I had asked if he wanted to hang out at the spaceship earlier, and he said sure. I honestly just wasn't ready to go back to the colony. And I wanted to feel... N's loving energy...It felt nice to know someone cared about me- though I'll never show it.

I seen V standing not too far away. I almost forgot about her. She decided to speak up saying, "Gosh took you two long enough. C'mon we've gotta get back before the Sun gets any brighter." N looked a little shocked at her statement. He replied back after a long pause saying, "Why did you wait for us?" V looked annoyed, then looked away. She looked a little pissed that N asked her that. She rolled her eyes before speaking up again. "It's really not that serious. Are you going to burn in the Sun or come back to the spaceship?? I don't have all day- literally." V didn't even wait for a response, she just started walking. Me and N just silently followed behind her, before she decided to fly away, sending a big burst of wind almost making me fall over. I only scoffed at her before I looked over towards N, only to see that he had his hand over his head, then turned towards me and smiled. I tried to ignore him and kept walking. I honestly don't know how to react to him being so nice.

I had my hands in my pocket, making sure that all my steps had a satisfying crunch. The whistle of the wind was calming in a way. The wind made sure that's the only thing I could hear. It almost felt like I was in my own dimension. My own little world. I was staring at my feet, satisfied with the soft crunch of the snow. Before I knew it, we were back at the spaceship.

     It was now pretty clear that it was daytime. N looked over at me and said, "Well, I guess it's time for me to go to sleep...heh. I'll talk to you tonight, okay? And if you need me don't be scared to wake me up!"  He said all of this with his cheerful tone he seems to always have before hanging upside down on a street light. I decided to let out a barely noticeable smile at him, then whispered, "Night..."

     I turned my attention to the spaceship and decided to do some work on it. The only problem was that I despised having to see V. Maybe since she got back earlier she was already in sleep mode.