Keep the memories Alive

Chapter 5

Present

Knock knock knock

"Mashie, are you okay?" Mrs. Lee asked, touching the wound of my forehead

"Don't worry, it'll be healed in a few days" I leaned back on the hospital bed, feeling guilty for worrying her

"Mom, Dad can you excuse me. I want to have a moment with Mashie" Nathan said

"Mashie, stop hurting yourself alright" Nathan said after his parent slammed the door shut

A tiny crystal tear slipped my eyes "He promised he will always be there for me; he has to save me or maybe we will be reunited again"

"Okay but he is not there anymore to save you" he tried to kept his voice calm and even. "This time you almost died, what if you are no longer somewhere in the world. you are selfish Mashie" he sighed 

I started to sobs, realizing how pathetic I am. I jumped off a building yet he still didn't save me. Ethan is really gone.

"You spent way too much times on hospital, you have been in a coma for a month. Do you think he is happy to see you like this? Jumping off a building? Seriously Mashie I thought you are smarter than this. You studied your ass off and now you are working for NEO CULTURE TECH one of the biggest companies in the world yet you skipped work because you are mourning over Ethan's death. Aren't you being too silly? Instead of living your life that you and Ethan dreamed off, you are finding way to die. Aren't you being too selfish? You know everyone is sad about Ethan, my parent fucking lost a son and I lost a brother. You know its suck for all of us but we are trying to accept the fate. We need to let go of him. My mom cried every night and dad has been having a nightmare. Everyone is struggling so hard to move on. We don't want to lose you after losing Ethan. I can't imagine losing my sister after losing my brother. I am pretty sure my parent doesn't want to lose their daughter. I am not scolding you alright. I understand your pain because we all experience the same thing. You need to move on and live your life to the fullest" Nathan cried, the last time I saw he cry was at Ethan's funeral and now he is crying because of me. I felt a sickening drop in my stomach. Am I being too selfish? Nathan left and leave me all by myself. I felt worse not knowing how everyone else felt. I become to focus on my feeling because I don't know how to move on from him. I had spent the night, hopping when I woke up, I see him again and what I was feeling was just merely a nightmare. Maybe I should start believing that he is no longer there to save me. This suck.