Keep the memories Alive

Chapter 7

My knuckles turned white around my knee. My eyes watery again. He got us a ticket to my favorite band and granted my wishes. I should be excited like he expected but I can't when he is not there anymore to company me to exo concert. Man, I can't believe it. How could I move on after this? I don't think I will attend the concert now that he is gone. I opened another box. It's looking depressing than me. I don't know grey color can make me so depressed. Aunty Lee told me that Ethan reminded her to give me this box if he never return. Holy shit. He knew something was off yet he still went for it. Why did I fall in love with an idiot? I sucked in my breath in a quick hiss and bit my lip. Inside the box contain a white color ipad. I turned it on. To my horror, I wished inside the ipad there were some sort of evidence that will bring justice to Ethan's death even though we all knew it was purely accident. For the first time since Ethan's death I smiled sincerely from my heart when our picture was set us the wallpaper. I was smiling at the camera while he stood there looking at me. My cheeks red, eyes wet again. I cant stop crying to the thought our love has ended. I opened the gallery. There were series of video. I opened the first one that label as episodes 1.

I sat on the hospital sofa with my headphone on. I want to hear clearly what Ethan has to say.

"Hey babe" I paused the video as I hear his voices. It took no effort at all for me to summon the tears. The tears came in a generous rush. It took 15 minutes for me to calm down . I blew my nose and continued the video.

Ethan was in his room. Wearing his hoodie, looking gloomy yet handsome.

Hey babe, you are watching this video because I left the world isn't it? I am sorry for not taking care of myself. And the worst part was I hurt you. You probably couldn't stop crying isn't it? I'm sorry. All I can do was apologized. I promised to see the world with you but now I left the world. You shouldn't forgive me. It was getting harder and harder seeing you cry and I feel super guilty for putting you in these situation . I hate to be the reason that crushed you down. I feel horrible that my girl who was always smiling now couldn't stop crying over her dead boyfriend. And I feel like crap about the fact that I want you to move on from me. I have been feeling uneasy about going to Indonesia so just to be prepared for whatever shit that is happening to me. I did this. I always felt like our love story is too easy, it's like a fairytale even though I am no Prince Charming . I always promised myself whatever obstacle that is going to happen in our love journey I will fight for it. It's you and me against the world. But right now, it's just you in this nightmare that was once a beautiful love story. I always remind myself that if the obstacle is one of us lost our memory of each other, don't worry I will make you fall in love with me again and if I lost memory of you, I will definitely would always fall for you. Because it's not Ethan Lee who wouldn't fall head over heels for Huang Mashie. I thought I would always be the hero who will fight for our love story. But life's short and my time end.  I want to celebrate that you survived whatever you are experiences. You deserve to live your best life. I want us to have as much as dates as possible. I want to help you to move on from me and accept the fact that I am no longer there. I created a series of videos. You and I will be going on several date. Now let us forgot the world. You and I are still in the same world. I want us to go to every place that we planned. Let's have a great memory my pretty girlfriend. I will be in the iPad while babe, I am going to burden you to carry me around. Tomorrow let's meet again at 8 am so now I want you to sleep. Don't play the other videos.