Dear Diary,
I think I messed up badly. Whatever me and Jack had is ruined. I am not sure what happened. Everything was off to a great start yesterday. Well except for the fact that Jack walked in on me showering. Oh well. He confessed that he had feelings for me but I told him it was complicated since I have feelings for both him and Lucius. After that we pulled a classic sleepover prank on the cast. They chased us around the whole house. We swam for a little and ordered chipotle. I guess he was jealous of how close me and Lucius was so he ran off before his food got here. It was super awkward after. I texted him and ended up crying all night. My eyes are super swollen so I am gonna take care of that right now.
Love, dumbass </3
I went into my kitchen grabbing two ice packs to help with the swelling on my eyes. I heard that spoons work too so I ran the spoons under water to get them wet and stuck them in the freezer. God I look fucking awful. I feel awful. I am just an awful person. I don't want to have to choose between Jack and Lucius but I can't help to like both of them. I didn't want this to be a fucking love triangle the fuck is my life right now. I plopped on the couch setting the ice packs on my eyes, just laying there with my own thoughts.
What if Jack never talks to me again? What if he is back to hating me? What if Lucius finds out that I like them both? Are they both gonna leave me? I just wish my heart wasn't so dumb. What if the whole cast starts to hate me because I broke both of their hearts? What if this is the end of my career? What if I am going to be alone for the rest of my life and I never get married and I die alone? All these what ifs and not a single solution. Come on brain, think. Think. I heard my phone buzzing and I took the ice packs off my eyes. Come on Lily not right now.
Me: Hello?
Lily: Hey girl! What you got planned for today?
Me: Rotting in bed. What about you?
Lily: Honey, what's wrong?
Me: Nothing.
Lily: Girl you better tell me what's wrong right now. Don't make me come over there.
Me: Can you kill me while you're at it?
Lily: Tell me. Now!
Me: Okay jeez, Mom. I am just having a rough time choosing between Jack and Lucius.
Lily: When did Jack come into the picture?
Me: Ugh I promised not to tell.
Lily: Well now you have to. I promise it will be between me and you.
Me: Mhmm. Jack confessed his feelings for me while you guys were sleeping.
Lily: *screaming* WHAT! OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD!
Me: Woah girl calm down.
Lily: Calm down? NO! I fucking knew it! Anyways, do you want to hangout with me later? It will cheer you up!
Me: My eyes are so fucking swollen right now I think it will take all day for them to look normal.
Lily: Why are they swollen hun?
Me: I was crying over Jack. It's not a big deal though. I am just scared that I fucked up and I will lose him.
Lily: Wha- *muted*
Me: Lily? Who was that? Lily? Hello? HELLO?
Lily: Sorry sorry. Don't worry I will have that fixed right now! Bye!
Me: What? *beep*
"Hello?" "What the fuck." That was so fucking weird. My phone buzzed and it was from Jack. Oh god.
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I Cross My Heart - Jack Champion
FanficY/n is new to the acting industry. She has always wanted to be an actor and was finally able to make her dream come true. She remembers seeing this actor named Jack Champion in a ton of movies and deemed him as her celebrity crush. She always though...
