Family away from family

Chapter 14. When no one is watching

27 July 2021

The following days there were no football matches being watched in our household. Jordan, Beth and I really wanted to support the girls, but somehow, we all felt jealous watching the games. We didn't felt like that while watching the first two games, but the closer the girls got to be playing in the knockout stages, the more jealous we got.

I know it sounds selfish and unfair towards our friends, but sometimes you need to do what's best for you and currently not watching games is one of those things.

Last night I had a surprisingly good conversation about it with Lucy.

|Flashback: 26 July 2021

Tomorrow will be the game against Canada, they are a tough opponent and GB really wants to win this one. To be fair I'm not really into watching the Olympics anymore and have no clue when which game will be played. I know this one, because Lucy asked to Facetime today to let go of some nerves before tomorrow. Like she ever really gets nervous? But any excuse to see and talk to Lucy is a good one. 

I sit on the sofa looking at my phone were Lucy is displayed laying on her bed with her hand under her head.

"Are you nervous for tomorrow?" I ask trying to be the supportive girlfriend, knowing I won't be watching.

"Kind of yea, I know we can win. We want to win, even though we are already through to the quarter finals." That's news for me. It hurts hearing her say 'we', normally I would be part of that 'we' and now I didn't even know they already were through.

"You've got nothing to lose then, right?" I say chirpy.

"Sure... but we still want to win." Again the 'we' is throwing me off. "You want to win games like that too, don't you?"

I stay silent for some time, not knowing what to say. Do I tell her I haven't watched a single game after the first game of GB and the Netherlands? Do I tell her I'm jealous? Do I tell her I'm not going to watch any of her games? "Yes of course I would want to win games like that." I say instead.

"You're being off, what's up?" Lucy asks sitting back up.

"Nothing, I'm fine." I try.

"You're not fine, tell me babe." She says reassuring.

"I'm not going to watch you play." I say slowly. "I'm not watching any football, really..."

She doesn't look hurt, more surprised. "That's ok schatje, you need to do what's best for you. I get it if watching us play can get too much, I won't judge you."

I didn't saw that coming at all. I thought she would question me, doubt my loyalty, but here she is being the amazing girlfriend she always has been.

"You really don't mind, me not watching you play?" I ask.

"Well no, I would love to have you watch them, but if it doesn't sit right with you, you obviously don't have to."

"Thanks Luce, I really needed to hear that. I felt like I was betraying you or something."

She chuckles slightly. "You silly, this is not betraying me. You also don't watch all the city games I play right? This is no different."

"How on earth is that the same Luce?" I laugh at her. "You are at the freaking Olympics and your girlfriend isn't supporting you."

"Well there you go wrong, vriendin. You are always supporting me if you are watching or not, you always support me. Like I always support you." She smiles, with a proud look on her face.

"How can you always know what to say?" I ask curious.

Lucy shrugs while Keira walks in the room to tell Lucy they need to go for a short meeting. Before leaving the room, she says hi to me, that she misses me and loves me and all those things.

After her rambling Lucy takes her phone back to say bye to me.

"I love you schatje, even though you are not watching, I will win this game for you. All the games I get to play, to be honest."

"You really are the best Luce, I love you too. Go win this thing!" I smile at her. |End of flashback

I'm really glad we eventually talked about. I don't like withholding things from Lucy, if there is something on my mind she is always the first to know.

Something that also changed in the no-Olympics-household is the fact we are not footballing ourselves anymore. We don't train the way we did, with the one-versus-one or other exercises. It's like we threw away football all together for the time being. It kinda feels nice, it kinda feels weird.

Jordan and I were bored, as usual, so we are on our way to a trampoline park. We dragged Beth with us, because she mocked us about it being something for children only. She is so wrong, on so many levels. Kids are mostly incapable to really do things on the trampolines, we can show off. Or maybe I can show off, I don't know if Jordan and Beth are any good with jumping on those things.