Trama Bonding

Complicated Emotions

Hola!! Excited to write a new part for you lovely people! Also, I found a song I thought fit with the vibe of the chapter. Please, let me know if you enjoy me adding a song or not.

Megatron POV

The lake seemed alive as the moonlight glided effortlessly over its dark waters. I relished in its peace as my spark beat refused to slow. I don't know how to deal with my emotions; for so long, I either hid them away or replaced them with anger. 

However, I have not felt this ache in my chest since before the war. A feeling so old I nearly forgot it existed within me at all. It is like a sickness, plaguing my spark every waking moment, but it gives me such a feeling of joy that consumes my whole being. I no longer know if I want this feeling to leave, but I know it leads me to Optimus. Whenever he crosses my processor, I fail to breathe steadily as his image overrides my every desire and thought. 

I turn to him at that thought, and his optics scan the water with a calm look. Carefully, he takes his time tracing the moonlight on the lake. He breathes slowly, and I admire his adaptability; after Cybertron fell and he was forced to flee, he still managed to stop me at every turn. Optimus is a worthy adversary, though not any longer, I suppose. 

He turns to me as well, and our optics meet. All thoughts come to a halt as I allow myself to be admired by this bot, one who has fought me with every ounce of his being. Even still, no malice lies in his optics. 

"How can you look at me like that Prime?" He is taken aback, and I watch as he tries to put the pieces together in his mind.

"Like what, Megatron?" He seems worried, as if he offended me in some way. I guess that hasn't changed since our youth.

"With no malice nor resentment. We battled for millennia, and nearly killed each other countless times, so how..." I took a moment, "How can you still look at me as if I am your world, as if you still adore me the way you did on Cybertron?"

After a moment's pause, the pieces clicked in his head. His optics leave mine for a second, and he gazes at the lake as he speaks, "Indeed, we have battled for many millennia, at odds for centuries, both causing so much destruction." He pauses.

His optics lock with mine, and he steps closer, reaching a servo out to my cheek; it rests, and he continues,

"But it has never changed the fact that you are my world. The context changed, but now, we may rest. The war is over, and we have a chance to return to the way we were before the war. Though these years of war have scraped away at my spark, I have always admired you. I refused to believe that the bot I knew was genuinely dead. I held out hope, and it seems that hope was well placed. For now, I may reunite with one I thought lost centuries ago."

We stand in stunned silence, both recognizing what he said, for he didn't think before he spoke. It was a rare instance to see, but he spoke with such passion, and I could tell his thoughts were not as organized as they usually were. I take the time to consider his words. Has he honestly held out hope for me? How much has it crushed him for me to ignore his pleas for peace?

He moves the take his servo from my face, but I catch it. I don't know why, perhaps to say something, though what could I say to him? I was never good at expressing emotion, but I recognize that I must change if we are both to begin again. I hate being vulnerable, but I speak,

"I admit, my feelings for you never left me either. I simply pushed them down because I believed that..." 

I trail off, and my optics drift away, not wanting to admit how weak Optimus made me. How, for countless nights, I fantasized about a different world where we spent the rest of our days together. Thinking that I had lost him forever, that every time we fought, it might be the last, and I might never get to see him again. Even now, I cannot bring myself to express these feelings.

I feel his other servo gently touch my face, and my optics are drawn back to his. He smiles gently and says, "You believed it would make you weak."

I tighten my servo around his and close my optics. I'm ashamed, I guess, for him to see through me so easily. But perhaps it isn't such a bad thing; the war is over, and I hardly have anything to lose if I let Optimus get close.

"Megatron, I know how you feel," I open my optics again to see Optimus has gotten impossibly close, not touching me but defiantly closer than he was. He goes to speak and hesitates, but it's alright; I know what he will say anyway.

"You also sealed your emotions away, though you chose to keep yourself balanced." I softly finished. A silent 'unlike me' hung in the air. He sighs, and a smile settles on his derma before he speaks,

"I am so grateful you know me so well."

With that, I move my servo that isn't holding his to rest upon his waist. A startled look flashes across his optics though he makes no move to distance himself. I watch as a blue blush creeps onto his faceplate as he takes in how close we are to each other. I lean in and whisper, "Optimus Prime, may I kiss you?"

A moment's pause; since when did I start asking permission? His blush deepens, and I smirk, loving the way he gets flustered. He struggles internally, and I can almost see the gears going up in flames as he tries to process my request. Eventually, he comes to a conclusion, and he nods sheepishly. 

I bring our dermas together, and for the first time since the start of the war, I felt a sense of true happiness wash over me as I savor every moment of our kiss. My spark leaped at this feeling, and I recognize that this was how it should be. Optimus and I, together. 

I begin to pull away, but I am stopped when Optimus pulls me back into the kiss, wrapping both arms over my shoulders and around my neck. I comply and snake both my arms around his waist, dragging my fingers over his frame as I do so. He shudders in my hold but doesn't break the kiss.

Reluctantly we part after a minute, and I savor the way Optimus looks. His mouth open, panting, a deep blush on his cheeks, and an undeniable shine to his optics. 

I smirk and cannot stop myself from embracing this perfect being, my other half, in every way. He reciprocates, and as we stay locked in an embrace, drinking in each other's presence, I make a silent vow to myself to never let him slip from my life again.