Philophobia ❧ JEONGCHAN

9

Daddy Issues-The neighborhood

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Chris and Jeongin. It didn't have a ring to it. If you swapped Jeongin out for his english name, Ian, it sounded better. Who cared? What mattered was that they were and. Together. It was the happiest either of them had been in years. Maybe the happiest Jeongin had ever been. He hated to think that because there were so many good things in life, but being beside Chris knocked everything else down like a row of dominos. Chris was the only one left standing.

Jeongin was still confused. That wasn't going to fade. He held doubt and he was scared. Vivian lurked his mind at nights. His mind told him things he didn't want to think about. Was he a replacement? Did Chris finally get tired of being alone and Jeongin was the easiest option?

But if he thought about it, and he looked the few weeks over slowly to analyze them, he knew he wasn't an option in Chris' life. Jeongin was it. The one. The only one. Maybe they never would have happened if Vivian was alive. If he thought about the maybes, there was a chance Jeongin never would have fallen for Chris in the first place because Vivian would have canceled out those feelings.

Soulmates didn't exist. That didn't mean he didn't belong to Chris, though. He would until he didn't. That's all he had to think about. If it happened it was supposed to be. If not. . .then life moved on. He wasn't going to live in the future. It's not like he'd have a cat fight with Vivian in heaven. Actually, he'd talked with her. Not literally, but had taken the time to look at the sky and explain his situation.

He apologized for taking Chris but not before ranting about how perfect he was. He asked forgiveness even if it sounded stupid. He told her he was going to take care of him. And after that, he had a connection to her. One that didn't make him feel so guilty.

Jeongin focused in on the real world, leaving his mind to examine Chris' sculpted body a few yards away on the shore. The younger was propped up on his elbows, glasses resting on the bridge of his nose to block out the sun rays. It was bright enough already with Chris' smile. He was genuinely so beautiful. Everything about him. From his calves all the way to his curls he was a man made by god.

They had decided on a beach date for their third date. He thought it was their third but honestly he wasn't sure. They had been hanging out whenever they got the chance. He'd learned a few new things about Chris. Things Chris didn't know about himself.

He was extremely possessive. Even when they met up with the group he had his hand on Jeongin's thigh or an arm around the back of his seat. None of their friends understood the small actions, and honestly Jeongin preffered it that way. He was enjoying their little secret relationship. He got to drink in all the moments. Especially the ones he was in now.

Chris on a chilled afternoon beach with sea water dribbling down the side of his face. He shook his wet hair out and stretched his arms above his head, muscles tense and on display for everyone to see. His shoulderblades popped out as he squatted down with his arms tucked out for a volleyball sent his way. The white gameball hit his forearms and launched back up over to another guy that was in the stance to set.

Jeongin didn't care about any setter. He was immersed in the shape of Chris' torso and his abdominal muscles. He wasn't ripped like a surfer boy. He was just a little under that definition. Jeongin loved it. Chris had a simple look and itnwasn't one of some super model. That was the best type of body.

He watched Chris stand up and slap his hand against one of the guys he had teamed up with. Honestly losing him to a few strangers for a game of volleyball should have been expected. Chris made friends with everyone even when he had looked emotionless. He was very approachable and people desired to have his companionship even if it lasted five minutes. Praise Jeongin. He got it for hopefully the rest of his life if he was lucky enough.