Bound

Chapter 41: Forgetting You

Blake

Emily described her past relations to me, picking up the half of the conversation we paused on when we started trying to explain love.

Similarly, to me, she has participated in a few one-night stands herself.

Although I didn't love to hear it, I can't say I'm surprised. There's no way she's gotten so good at, well, everything she does without a little experience.

"You know," she shifts further away from me and holds her hands in her lap, "there are things I wish I could forget about past relationships."

"Like what?"

She clicks her phone on and glances at the screen. "It's late, maybe we can have the 'exes talk' later," she says even though were already at the backside of this conversation.

"Emily." I scowl and she laughs. "You brought it up. Don't leave me hanging like that."

"Well, I've already told you how close I was to my best friend, Chris, when I was younger. We never were officially together, but I think he was my first heartbreak. Especially since we were so close, and everything changed abruptly in my life when my mom passed away." She shrugs as if she's just reading off a list, but I know this is hard for her to talk about. That must be why she's avoided it so far.

"How'd it change?" I ask as if I'm not morbidly aware of the first heartbreak we both share.

"I feel like it's weird to talk about." She laughs nervously.

"It's not weird." I encourage.

"I'm not really sure. It wasn't just losing my mom. I feel like she was the foundation of everything. When I lost her, I lost my relationship with my dad and my relationship with Chris. Not only because I moved away."

"Why then?" I continue to play ignorant of the past I shouldn't be so familiar with. Her eyes never meet mine when she tells this story. She stares at her palms as if she's embarrassed or guilt-stricken or something. I try hard to read her.

"Because Chris's dad...he...much like my dad, was a piece of shit, honestly. It felt like everything our entire lives led up to this moment-led up to me losing her," she says dryly, then a contempt smile appears on her face. "I thought I'd marry him one day. In my silly kid brain. But, after everything, I was all alone. Then came Oliver."

"Oliver?" I squint in disgust. I was hoping she'd talk more about this first heartbreak, but it seems she's already moving on to the next.

"Yeah, he was God-awful." She perks up with annoyance and rolls her eyes at the thought of this Oliver guy and I try not to laugh. "He taught me the definition of a narcissist," she says with a sour taste on her tongue.

"When was this?" I ask to get a timeline for reference.

"After I moved back here to my first school my junior year. I was in my rebellious stage, as one without parents would be at that point, I guess. My aunt thought bringing me back here would help. Spoiler; it didn't." She gives that nervous laughter again. "I think it was from like the ages of sixteen to eighteen. Oliver and I were together a really long time for teens. Even so, I knew I'd never marry him. However, he did propose to me," she admits and visibly cringes.

"Definitely narcissistic behavior." I cringe with her, and she giggles. I never knew she moved back here her junior year. The summer before that was when I moved away.

I'd say it was fate that brought us back together despite the past we'd much rather escape.

"I wish that was the worst of it. I could go on for days about all the fucked-up shit he did to me but to keep it short, I had no boundaries at that age, especially after everything that happened before that. And he took full advantage of me. He saw this mythical future for us where I'd get pregnant at seventeen and he'd work, and I'd stay at home. Then he'd probably limit everything I did and do whatever he wanted to, cheating on me included.