Sorry For Existing

One's End And Another's Beginning

Hello, guys! I have had this idea in my head for a long while! Since the fated 2020 to be honest!

This story is ongoing I'm currently working on what would be chapter 24, I'm uploading the first chapter because I want to see how it will be received! So, please, don't be shy to comment down below and tell me your thoughts! But please be as kind as you can!

Also, this story hasn't been Beta-read because I don't have one so you're bound to see a few if not many spelling errors!

Another thing, this story was inspired by Paris Paloma's song called Labor, I suggest listening to it while you're reading this story!

Lastly, mind the Triggers!

*Trigger Warnings: Mention of Rape, Torture, World Wars, Imprisonment, Domestic Abuse, Child Abuse, Mention of the war in Ukraine and several ongoing touchy topics, Mention of the Covid-19 Pandemic.*

Other than that, enjoy!!!

Marilena Dimitriadou or as she was commonly known as Lena, was a young woman who killed herself at the young age of 24 years old. Lena spent most of her life trying to survive an emotionally and sometimes physically abusive household. Where she had to play the role of the older child, the mother, the caretaker, the nurse and the maid, she played these roles so well and she was so focused on doing her bestowed duties to the best of her ability so she won't get reprimanded by her parents that whatever dreams about a future away from them seemed impossible so she never thought about it.

Teachers would ask kids what they wanted to be when they would grow up but Lena never had a true answer, she would say Archeologists just to satisfy the teachers' expectances. She didn't know what were her talents, what were her gifts.

Yes, she had a passion for writing and photography and as a young teen she would sometimes fantasize how nice it would be is she could become a writer and live somewhere alone and quietly. But by the time she was 18 and started looking for jobs she received so many rejections that it discouraged her and make her feel as if it was all pointless. And no one would hire her because she was inexperienced. Years went on and a pandemic came everything changed, another recession came and suddenly Lena found herself being 23 not 19 as when the whole pandemic started. And now people won't hire her because she was old and inexperienced!

So life has been kicking her in the balls! She's living with her parents who now are bit passive aggressive with their abuse. She had enough! She was never good for them and now she was burdening them.

So suicide it was!

For years she fantasized about suicide and ending it all, the pain, the tiredness, the guilt, the anxiety, the loneliness, depression and sadness. When she decided to kill herself she did her research, Google tried its best to deter her from killing herself by bombarding her with ads about mental health counseling and resources in her area, but she ignored them and kept studying.

She poisoned herself with wolfbane, a little every day in her meals, she was dead within a week and the corner couldn't detect why!

Lena expected nothingness afterwards but not waking up in the body of Elena Gilbert as a newborn baby!!!

Lena spent the first year of her new life confused and thinking things through. In her past life, haha, she had seen the show the Vampire Diaries, and so far everything looked the same. So, she guessed that in sixteen years she will look like Nina Dobrev which was awkward! Before her death, Lena had long black hair, dark brown eyes and was tall with relatively white skin due to not going out in the sun much... more like vitamin D3 deficient white. She wasn't anything gorgeous she was average.